My You | BTS (Bangtan Sonyeondan): The Final Book in the 'Euphoria' Trilogy.

"Forever and Ever, and Ever..."

Listen To: "With You" by Jimin and Ha Sungwoon
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[Please, assume all conversations are in Korean]

[A/N: Thank you so much for your patience. A crashed hard drive, a completely lost story, a crazy busy time in my life and so many more things have kept me from updating but I'm back and I can't wait to continue the final book in this series with you guys. I appreciate you all so much .]
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"What do you mean?" I ask him. My heart feels like it's going to beat right out of my chest. I'm trying to tell myself not to freak out; I can't. Not here, in front of all these people. I can't live my life without him; I can't breath without him. He can't be doing this; this isn't real.

"I just—" he brings his eyes back to look at me, they're so sad, so full of something I can't quite grasp but it's something I've never seen before and it scares me. It worries me that this is it; that I've lost him and I can't possibly live through this.  "I don't know how much longer I can handle this," he continues.

"What, though?" I let out, my breathing shallow and staggered. "What did I do? How did I mess up? I'm sorry, whatever it is, please I'll fix it. Please just tell me and I'll make it better," I'm begging him as I reach toward him. I've said it once and I'll say it again, I'll never be above begging when it comes to them. I take a step toward him and ball his shirt up in my fists and pull him to me, my eyes finding his and pleading with him. "Please, don't leave me. Jin-ah, please," I say.

"What?" He asks me, his brows furrowing in confusion. "What are you saying?" He says as his hands cup my face, his eyes frantically trying to find an answer within mine. The tears fall down my cheeks and then it's like it hits him, hard and heavy; the realization of where my mind went. "Eleanor no, no baby, no. Oh my god, no Ella," he lets out frantically.

"I love you. Ella, look at me, I love you so much. I am not leaving you. I'm not going anywhere. I could never leave you Eleanor," he tells me, trying to get it though to me.

"Then why did you say that? What can't you do?" I ask him in between small sobs, needing to hear him tell me.

"I love you Eleanor," he tells me, his thumbs grazing my cheeks "and it's because I love you so much that I can't hide this anymore," he says, his own eyes damp with tears. My hands go up to his face and it's like we are in a war over each other, needing to touch, needing to comfort each other in our pain.

"I want to love you Eleanor; love you loud. I want to talk about you. I need to be able to answer truthfully when people ask me; tell them that i'm so in love. I want to let everyone know how happy I am, that my future is in you. I dream of saying 'this is my girlfriend. This is my fiancé," he continues his finger twisting the ring on my finger. "'This is my wife. This is the person that I love and chose to spend my life with,' " he says and my thumb catches the tear that falls from the corner of his eye. "I want to love you and I want everyone to know that I love you. I can't hide you, I can't hide us anymore," he finishes and I feel my heart clenching in my chest.

"Seokjin-ah," I let out. His hands move to my hips as he pulls me against him. "I want those things too. I want to post all the silly photos we take on instagram," he smiles down at me. "I want to be able to answer with stories of you when someone asks me about my boyfriend. I want nothing more that to be yours, in every aspect of life," I say.

"But..." he pouts.

"We can't right now Baby," I say with so much love but very matter of factly. I needed him to hear what I am about to say. "But in 24 months, just 2 years Jin-ah, you'll be back from your military service and we can do that. Just like we planned. We can be out and happy and in love and everyone can know," I reassure him.