after Allen Ginsberg
America whose face should I wear to meet you on the other side?
Mammy Sapphire Matriarch or Jezebel?
Look at me.
Watch me tie the apron of mythology around my hips again.
America are you looking?
America I know I was never innocent
Please do not resent me my deranged beliefs in the goodness of my blood.
America I know you were always meant to be clean.
I have stained your face with my unclean hand.
America I will help you wipe the blackness from your cheek if you let me keep mine my blood.
America I know now humanity is a privilege I cannot afford.
America I will lay down my rock if you lay down your guns.
I will lay down for you.
Be the good little lamb waiting for the knife.
America have I been a good sacrifice?
What do you think you will see inside?
What do you think you will taste when you feast on what remains of my girlhood?
And what will you feed on when I am all gone?
America how long do you think you can survive on my meat alone?
America I am starving.
America you are starving.
America we are starving.
America what can we eat if not each other?
If not myself, who can I sacrifice?
America I do not know how to love a thing without consuming it.
I only know how to eat and eat until nothing remains.
