Till death do us apart » Han Jisung

01

[JAEEUN'S POV]

My feet betrayed my heart, refusing to dive into the air.

The cold breeze crushed my body, trying to sweep the remains into the emptiness, but even then my feet remained fixated on their place. I looked down as my hands embraced myself. The high distance made my heart run around in my chest as it guided the anxiety all over my body.

A shiver danced down my spine as my own hands gripped myself closer and tighter. The people standing near the building radiated happiness. Though, their faces were out of my sight, just their tiny figures stood strong enough to give a hint of their euphoria.

Then my head rested back, my eyes meeting the evening sky. The orange tint resembled the soft fur of a fox, while the white clouds shaped up into the white skin. This would be my last time meeting the beauty of the sky and my heart begged me to digest all the beauty of the sun meeting the oceans as it waited to meet its sleep.

A sigh left my mouth, my lungs shivering as I tried to breathe in the air that swam all around me. My chest tightened, suffocating my veins as it ran through my body. It was being stolen away from me, but I couldn’t get myself to complain. My body waited to fall into the dark epitome of death, and I wanted to give in.

The waves of tears in my eyes too brought a flood over my figure. My memories, that I thought I kept in the small jar of my remembrance tightly, weren't so tight after all. My mind intoxicated me with all the small sips of the liquor of pain.

"Like it?" The sound of my mother’s voice rattled through the small walls as I nodded and smiled. I clinged onto the small brown, furred teddy as a small trail of giggles left me.

“Love it!” I exclaimed, taking her hand in my small ones, connecting our fingers as I compared the hand size. She chuckled slightly, keeping my body close to her own as I felt the warmth radiating her body mixing into my own.

“Nice birthday, hm?” 

I shut my eyes tightly, ending the scene of the past that unfolded in front of my vision. My history washed over me like a flood, drowning me. I fought the waves, but I could only sink deeper in the saddening memories. No matter how much I gasped for air, the only thing engulfing my soul was the water of pain.

"Jaeeun, slow down! You will fall!” Dad’s voice rang around the air as I peddled on the cycle faster. A trail of laughter left me as I caught a glimpse of him sitting on the chair.

“I won’t fall. I’m a master at this!” I shout at him, the wide smile never fading off of my face.

“Yeah, sure you are.”

I quickly reach my hand up to my face, throwing away the droplets of tears flowing down my face before they could fall onto the ground by themselves. My hands were enveloped around my trembling body once again, the memories of my childhood flashing in front of my vision over and over.

I took a deep breath in, shutting my eyes tightly to prevent the sight in front of me. A step forward, and my heart started to run around in my chest, as my stomach turned at the fear of pain.

Just as my feet were ready to be encased by the air, an engraving grip on my arm swung me back as a yelp rolled over my tongue without wasting a second. I never was able to dive in the black hole. My body did fall, but not on the side I wanted.

But, I was so close!

My body crashed onto the body of the person who pulled me back on the ground, as both of us fell on the ground, with me on top of them. Once again, etars formed their little pond in my eyes.

As oxygen filled my lungs, they strangled in the burning contact with the icy breeze. A gasp left my lips, as the realization finally hit me.

“What are you doing? Let me go!” I move around in his grip, tears already raining out of my eyes. My hopes were crushed by the hammer of his ‘help’. I failed, once again.

“No, no, no, what are you doing? You can’t leave like that! Think about—˚ He exclaimed, his voice was as sweet as honey, but his tone stood hard like ice.

“Think about who? Friends? I have none. Parents? My father does not care about me, and my mother—” My own tears choked my throat, my chest clenching as I reminded myself of the shattering memories.

“Then I’ll be your friend. I’ll love you like anyone you want, but please don’t leave. You don’t deserve such a cruel death.” His arms wrap around my body, as his voice cracked at the last sentence, sadness dripping off his tone.

“But I—”

“Shh. I’ll take you to a classroom, let it out there. You don’t want to be vulnerable in front of the students who make rumors any moment they get. Let’s leave this terrace.”

[AUTHOR'S NOTE]

hi pookies