Whispers of Self

Chapter 7

On Monday the library board President and Vice President pulled Janet, Alex, and me into the conference room. Both middle aged men, placed themselves at the head of the table. I had grabbed the chair beside Janet, across from Alex who was leaning back in her chair, her arms crossed. 

The police had arrived minutes before Janet on Saturday. While Janet had ushered people out of the library, Alex and I gave our statements to the officers. I was numb as I spoke, a familiar cool prickly sensation overwhelming my body. Afterward, I couldn't remember what I had said to the officers or even the drive back to my apartment. 

Robert, the board President, had spent the past half hour discussing the man who had come into the library. "While we do not condone Mr. Whitlock's actions, it is important to discuss the delicacy of this situation."

"What are you saying Robert?" Janet asked. There was an edge to her voice. 

The man sighed. "As you know Janet, the library relies on donations from the Whitlock family. We have spoken to him and he was upset that the library hadn't been conducting regular maintenance on the grandfather clock he donated."

"Why didn't he just tell us he wanted the clock fixed?" While Alex's tone was calm, her fists were clenched.

Robert leaned forward when he responded, folding his hands on the table. "We spoke with Mr. Whitlock's wife and she said he's been having some mental issues lately."

"So how do you advise we proceed?" Janet asked. 

"To avoid this in the future, we plan on hiring a company to conduct regular maintenance on the clock," Robert stated. He turned to me before saying, "Mrs. Whitlock has asked that you not to press charges as her husband is in such a fragile state. She also has donated an additional 15 grand to the library to cover any..." He hesitated then said, "physical or emotional damages."

Janet spoke before I could say anything. "Robert while that is quite generous of Mrs. Whitlock, you cannot ask that of Ellie."

The man nodded. "That is true, but I wanted there to be complete transparency." He turned his attention back to me. "Of course the decision is up to you."

"Ellie we will stand behind whatever you decide to do," Janet said, she placed a well meaning hand on my shoulder. 

While I knew that Janet meant her words, the decision didn't feel up to me as the Whitlock's donation caused a weight on my chest. Alex's body was no longer relaxed and when my eyes met her they were dark and heated. The number of book requests had piled up in our Baker and Taylor carts. Many beloved youth and adult books had been pasted back together with packaging tape. But it was more than that. The public and circulation desktops and printers hadn't been replaced in a decade. There was a need for the library to provide more STEAM programming and supplies. This decision couldn't be up to me. 

"I'm not going to press charges," I said. 

"Are you sure?" Janet asked.

"Yes," I said. Once again my eyes met Alex's. Her eyes became even darker, her jaw clenched. Without a word she stood and left the room.