The Summer Of Love

I THOUGHT YOU'D BE BETTER THAN THIS

We both sit there awkwardly. But it's him who came to me, so I don't even try to break the silence. He seems to get the point because he says atlast, "So.. what's up?"

I raise an eyebrow at him. "Alright, I'm sorry. I didn't tell you about her," he sighs.

"There's no need to apologise. I thought we were friends but, well, we saw how it's going," I say as if I'm talking about the weather. No harm in pulling his leg, right? Right.

"It's been a short time, you know it," he tries to be logical. And there's warning in his tone.

"Oh yeah? It's been more than two weeks! Akshat, I've seen people mentioning their partners all the time and you.. it felt like you forgot her. I didn't realize people forget their partners," I say. And I'm not even wrong about it. Atleast I think so. It's a stupid excuse he gave me.

"Because we're not in a relationship by choice. I don't know about her but I'm definitely not. Yes, I'm dating her in front the world and our parents but not by assent. I don't have a choice!" There's a little harshness in his tone.

Like that's going to make things alright. I refrain from saying, you didn't mention that, either. But the way I'm looking at him says it all. "Forget it, I don't want to argue with you this early in the morning," I sigh. He tries to speak but seems to understand because he nods.

"So you jog everyday?" A very bad way of changing the topic. But it works for me.

"Yeah, you?" he says.

"Yeah, kinda. I haven't jogged since arriving to Jaipur. Yesterday I-" I stop abruptly. I don't know if I should tell him about my nightmares.

"I'm sorry if me not telling you about her is bothering you so much," he says. He's guilty, as he should be but.. I can't see that look on his face.

"No, it's not that. I just.." I just what? Don't trust you enough to talk about it? I feel pathetic.

"It's fine. We're not in a hurry. Tell me whenever you feel like it," he smiles at me. I nod but still say it. Tell him all about it. And how running helps me.

"So when you're with someone you know, such things don't happen? How?" he asks

I shrug. "There's a feeling, you know? That you're not alone, that someone is there whenever you want. That contentment is enough for me to not overthinking maybe. I don't really know," I say. But there's another part to it, that I didn't tell him. How I started getting them. I shiver at the thought and look back at him. Not even my mother knows the real reason.

"I understand," he smiles warmly.

"Well, I'm still angry. So don't think that we're all good," I say moving my hand between us. He nods and I get back to running. "Oh, and by the way, we're not on talking terms as of now."

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I skip breakfast and stay in the room actually working on my assignments. Though I've to submit it after weeks, I'm doing it now so to avoid thinking about it during the functions.

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"You done?" Sonali looks nauseated seeing all the assignments.

"Yup. I feel so much better now," I laugh.

We both descend the stairs and see the choreographers coming in. We go through the antechamber and enter a huge room equipped with speakers, a mirror in place of a wall and air conditioning. My guess is it's a home theatre and all the seats were removed for our practice. Wow. Everyone's taking this really serious. I should too, I guess despite being a below average dancer. But Sona is here to give me company.