Wolfgang Joins a Gang

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The hat belonging to Wolfgang is very old but shiny.
He likes youthful things like grasshoppers and the Beatles but he despises babies.
Wolfgang is criminally offensive to to adults.
His grandma passed him salt for his pickles and cheese.
It was painful to watch the destruction of the table.
He never agreed to work for the mafia but he hated the CIA because they wanted to arrest his grandmother who murdered her hippopotamus aggressively.
Gloria welcomed Wolfgang into her gang graciously because she liked him enough to not hurt him.
He loved himself.
Sadly, he attended shooting lessons taught by an octopus who was mentally ill! Which was obviously a very bad idea because he ended up being not very nice to Wolfgang.
He was the best and being a stressed pest.
And Wolfgang followed in the octopus' steps and became annoying.

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