Beauty in the cracks

Flowers for home

Jungkook took a deep breath as he entered the therapist's office. Things had been going well lately, but his nerves still spiked when it came time to attend his appointments. The weeks seemed to fly by, but he wasn't complaining. It's been four months since he'd left Shownu. It's been three and a half months since he'd seen him, and it's been three months of regular therapy appointments. 

It's been four months of living with Hoseok. 

They have a routine now, eating their meals together, hanging out when they're free, he visits the club and the cafè, and in turn Hoseok has brought him lunch in his office and stayed to chit chat with Jimin and Yoongi. It's nice, it feels nice, and Jungkook tries not to focus on the fact that it makes him feel warm and like he's more home than he's ever been in his life. 

Namjoon and Jin have tried and failed to keep their opinions to themselves, insisting that the two are feeling more than friendship “it's the way he looks at you, the way you look at him even when he's not looking” he waved them off and pretended that the thought didn't make his stomach swirl and sink all at the same time. 

He's gotten better at accepting love and help, he's gotten better at reaching out, at voicing his opinions and needs but there's still a lot of work to be done and admitting that Hoseok makes him feel anything other than a close friendship isn't even a thought he'd care to entertain. 

So, he sat in his therapist's office and answered her questions, asking some of his own, confronting his fears and opinions of his past relationship and how to fix himself so he didn't continue to feel like he was dragging everyone down with him. He sought reassurance that his friends were his friends because they loved him, not because they pity him and were afraid of hurting his feelings. 

Jungkook is desirable. As a friend, a boss, a son, as a person. “Even romantically, Jungkook, I know it's too soon, but eventually you will find someone who makes you feel complete. They're going to love you unconditionally, and you'll feel safe enough to open yourself up to them and accept them as they are. It feels like being home, it doesn't feel like breaking yourself into pieces to avoid arguments” 

He didn't like that statement. Not because it wasn't true, it is, but because there was only one person who came to mind, and he'd been trying not to look at him that way. But when his appointment was done, that's exactly who he wanted to see, so he got into his new car and drove over to the club. 

What Jungkook didn't know was that Hoseok was struggling to do the same. 

“It was so funny though, Jungkook tried to balance the wine bottle on the edge and next thing we know- mind you I told him it wouldn't work, our bath was filled with red wine and Jungkook looked too shocked to do anything” he snorted and laughed as he helped Tae carry the kegs to the storage room behind the bar, Tae chuckled, he sat the keg down and looked over at Hoseok with a small smile 

“So, have you told him yet?”

“Told him what?” He rolled the keg to the corner of the room beside the one Tae put there 

“About your feelings” 

“What feelings?” He furrowed his brows 

“Come on, Hobah. You've had a thing for the kid since he walked in here all those months ago. I can't imagine living with him, and taking weekly wine baths with him has helped that any” 

He wanted to lie, but he sighed and sat on one of the wooden crates used for the fruits “no” he shook his head “I don't think it's appropriate. I'm genuinely his friend and just trying to help. he's been doing so much better since the night that douche bag came in here and I'd hate for him to think I'm taking advantage of our situation or he'll think he has to return my feelings because he'll feel bad if he doesn't”