Love, Blood and Wilderness | YELLOWJACKETS

Chapter 44

    Months went by. Much faster than I would've thought.

    It was nearing the end of summer. Natalie had kept her promise. She got us through the winter. She kept us alive.

    We never did find out who killed Ben, if anyone killed him. Instead, we were grateful that his body was able to get us through the last few months of winter.

    We didn't freeze. Natalie found a way to insulate the cave with dead moss. We were all alive. For now.

    Nat and I had been dating since I chose her, and it was the most beneficial decision I could have made. As always, Nat was right.

    She would take me out on dates like she said she would. We went stargazing, she made up games using sticks and rocks. We told each other everything about our entire lives. She told me about her mom, what happened to her dad. She told me the good, the bad, the ugly, the devastating. And I did the same.

    She took care of my stab wound which was now nearly healed. It was very visible, just as Van's scars were, but I felt so much better.

    It was hard to be intimate with Nat in the winter, as we weren't able to bathe and clean ourselves as often. We all caught head ticks at one point in the spring.

    But once the weather got warmer, we were able to use the lake again and Nat and I were finally able to be intimate. We would sneak off together and fuck in flower beds, on large rocks, anywhere we could. Once we were able to get clean, we couldn't keep our hands off each other.

    But choosing Nat wasn't only good for me. It was good for the group. Nat was able to form her council. Nat and Tai worked really well together, surprisingly. If you told me that a year ago, I wouldn't have believed you.

    Nat, Travis and Tai would hunt together and Tai would place markers in open areas, hoping that maybe we would find a family camping there or hunters. We never did.

    Food was readily available now. We were eating good thanks to Nat and Travis. Travis and Tai were able to scavenge for berries and such, to switch up our all protein diet.

    While they were gone, Van and I hung out. We became really close while our girlfriends and Travis were on hunting duties. We would make schedules for the girls to follow, doing chores, skinning the animals for clothes, etc. I noticed Van was getting colder though, she wasn't her usual happy-go-lucky self. But I did what I could to keep her entertained.

    And of course, Nat kept her promise, Lottie was on the council.

    We hadn't talked much in the last few months. When I first chose Nat, she wouldn't speak to me. I would hear her crying before she slept or whispering odd things to the Wilderness in french that I couldn't understand. She insisted to the council that we continue rituals with the animals so that the Wilderness continued to feed us and keep us alive.

    Eventually, she would make eye contact with me during the rituals. She would offer me a smile every now and then.

    She did her best to leave me alone, but she has came crying and panicking to me sometimes. I would hold her until she calmed down and she left me alone again. I would find her at the ashes of the cabin, on her knees whispering. I never interrupted her.

    Shauna wasn't in the council. And she was angry.

    But, of course, she couldn't hurt Nat without hurting me and backed off. She hasn't spoken to me since I chose Nat. She hasn't spoken much to anyone. She spent her time going on walks and skinning and cutting up the animals.

    I'd been secretly reading her journals. She really missed me. She felt terrible. But mostly she was mad that Nat had me. She would beg to get pregnant again in her entries so that we could go back to how we were. In a few more entries she asked Jackie for help.