The Stegosorcerers

Chapter 2

     The group of 7 walked through the forest. It was safe to say that they'd be lost without the help of Carp. He was the only one who could actually read a map. Still, they weren't 100% sure where they were.
"How much longer?" Socks asked.
"I don't know, 30 minutes? 40?" Carp replied.
"How come you don't know?" Asked Nuggets. Carp gave a harsh breath through his nose.
"Well, probably because someone," he paused, glaring at Boris, "crumpled the god damn map while digging through the bag!"
"In my defense, the pretzels were not where I was promised they were," Boris responded.
"So?"
"Oh, come on guys!" Nuggets said in a gentle tone, trying to avoid further arguments, "Boris, it's 'cause he really likes pretzels and he doesn't like change!" Boris huffed.
"He coulda just asked," he muttered. Nuggets sighed in defeat.
     After a few minutes of silence, Gnome asked, "Gus, remind me again why you're here?"
"'Cause I'm finding Mister Hache and we need to head in the same direction!" He explained.
"Oh, speaking of that, we should be hitting a fork in the road soon where you'll need to take a left," Carp said. Gus nodded. Before long, they approached the fork. Gus said goodbye and headed off. All he needed to do was follow the path and he'd reach the house.
                                           • • •
     Gus had been traveling for about 10-15 minutes. He'd honestly expected to be there by now. Carp did tell him to go straight once on the road, right?
"Boo!" The sudden sound scared the shit out of Gus.
"Gah! Hell!" he yelled. He heard a giggle. "Dammit, Appendix!"
"That was soooo funny!" Appendix giggled, her headband bouncing. Every Stegosorcerer had a hat, or at least those who had mastered their element had. Appendix had mastered hers early. The hat she'd chosen was one of those headbands with springs on it, except the guys at the end of the springs were eyes. That was because she was the Stegosorcerer of eyeballs. Never, and I mean never, look in her backpack. You'll regret it. (Hint: it's jars of her element in formaldehyde) "Whatcha up to?" She asked joyfully.
"I'm trying to find Mister Hache's residence," he replied. Her eyes lit up.
"Oh I can help!" She turned around to look at her surroundings. "Uhh, you're a little off.... We need to go back."
     They headed back for a few minutes before Appendix turned into a small gravel path that Gus hadn't noticed.
"Why the fuck is it so discrete?" He asked her.
"Two things, one: 'cause Mister Hache has powerful objects such as his stegostaff that can't be found by people like Jasper. Two: do you have a dollar?" He looked at her confused.
"The hell? Why do I need a dollar?"
"Well now you need two. It's 'cause of the swear jar," she explained.
"Oh," he said, "yeah I have two dollars."
"Good!" They walked in silence. After a solid 20 minutes, Gus saw the house through the trees. It was magnificent.
"Hello, Appendix, Sarcophagus," a deepish voice said. Gus turned and saw a buff-ass bipedal stegosaurus.
"Mister Hache..." he said in amazement.
"'Course it's me, jackass!"
"Dollar!" Appendix hollered.
"Fuck you!" Mister Hache replied. This was not at all how Gus imagined Sir Major Colonel Lieutenant Major Colonel General Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia Esquire would be.
"Shocked, are ya?" Asked Appendix.
"Why the hell would he be?" Asked Mister Hache.
"Well, it's just that I wasn't expecting you to curse like that," Gus said, "also, I guess I didn't really expect Appendix to be so... comfortable?... with you. Like interaction-wise." Appendix giggles, letting the headband bounce.
"That's 'cause he's my brother, silly!" Appendix said.
"Damn straight!" Mister Hache replied. Gus' eyes widened.
"Stop cursing! I'll tell Mom!"
"You wouldn't dare!"
"Oh I so would!"
"You'll just get in trouble too!"
"Why would I?"
"'Cause Mom doesn't like dealing with us when we're like this!"
"Damn..." Appendix said, defeated. "Oh, yeah! Why did you need to come here, Gus?"
     Gus explained the problem of his burnt stegostaff.
"I see, I see..." Mister Hache said, "I'll help. Appendix, you'll come with us because I need to watch you."
"What!? Why!? I don't want to!" She exclaimed.
"Because Mom doesn't trust you after you almost burnt the house down."
"It was one time! And if I wasn't supposed to play with fire, then it wouldn't be so damn pretty!" she complained. Mister Hache sighed.
"If it makes it better, you can bring Cushion." She gasped excitedly.
"Really?!"
"Yep." She ran off to get 'Cushion.'
"Eh- what's cushion?" Asked Gus.
"I think you mean 'who,'" Mister Hache began, "look." As he said that, Appendix came running in, followed by a small eye with a mechanical body, similar to a spider.
"What the fuck have I gotten myself into..."