Purgatory

Call a spade a spade, and a jack a jack

Author's Note

Spoiler warning for triggers:

Trigger warnings:
Underage prostitution
Self harm
disassociation

So... Hi, I've been working on this for a while and I'd love to hear your thoughts on some of the new formatting I've been using or any other thoughts about the chapter, I'd really appreciate constructive criticism!

Also, how are we all? It's been a while.

I once read a book where this guy said, "Call a spade a spade and a jack a jack, but *always* call a whore a lady. Their lives are hard enough." so that's where the title is from.

Anyway, enjoy :)

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They were on the move again; Benny had hardly needed five hours to heal completely. Artemis was relaxed for the first time all day. And Benny was making casual conversation, trying to make him laugh, or saying the kind of thing that made Artemis roll his eyes and at least pretend to be annoyed.

They lulled into silence and he felt a sudden pull to speak, "When I was... in Hell... I stopped fighting Alastair, not that I could do much... but, well. Anyway, he let me out of my cell after a while, he still kept an eye on me. He taught me to... torture people. I wasn't... I didn't want to, but I couldn't... I was scared and it was as if he was..." the words evaded him all of a sudden, "He was one of the only people I was allowed to see, and It was hard... not to listen to him." God, he sounded young, even to his own ears. He looked up for some kind of assurance.

Benny was clearly focused on him. Just listening.

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"After that... I worked in the more academic side of it. Designing plans for the demons to follow with certain people, steering politics towards general anarchy, creating chaos really. I didn't realise at the time but, when I was hurt, my soul started to crack and pieces of Hell lodge themselves in. It's how Demons come to be. I stopped caring as much about everything, pain, other people. I became stronger too, the longer I stayed there. I preferred it, that would make me a pretty terrible person, wouldn't it?"

Benny cast a disapproving glance over to him, "You didn't have a choice. Preferring to feel less pain is natural."

Artemis shrugged, feeling relieved Benny saw it like that, like it was the only thing he could have done. Now he'd only have convince himself, "I guess... Then, he- Alastair sent me to a war zone." Benny looked like he was trying not to interrupt, his expression too kind, it almost hurt. "The angels had begun a full-frontal assault on hell, it had been going on for maybe five years at that point. I was there another eight years before they breached the city. An angel, a powerful one, looked into my mind and... he saw what happened. He... purged my soul I think and sent me back here."

Benny's sunlit features were twisted in concern, sympathy, and tenderness that almost hurt, "I'm glad you're back lad. You've gone through enough. None of it was your fault, it's all on them."

Artemis felt like he might cry. Someone reacting to this made him feel like he wasn't crazy, like he wasn't just moping. Something white hot and real unfurled in his chest.

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