Chapter 1

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I hate pants. I’m glad women can wear them, I just don’t want to be one of them.
The only reason I’m wearing these leather contaminants is because it’s below thirty degrees and I’m not looking to freeze to death when I step inside the building.
Love is a distant aroma at best…
A withering smile stuck deep in your vest…
Wow, what perfect lyrics to arrive to work with.
The night air it wraps- it’s fingers around… I’m quick in switching the music to my airpod, which prompts me to sing the lyrics myself while I walk to the door. Your body, it shakes from the now distant sound.
“Oh, the sound of her voice, a sweet symphony, played over and over until you are free.” Are the only lyrics I get in when I step inside the building. I can’t sing here. Not with crazy gossipers and his eyes and ears everywhere.
Speaking of his eyes and ears…
Aspen Caspians eyes scan the lobby floor, but I’m not able to check him out when I  duck behind a man with a bright yellow suit. Oh, of course it’s Jonah. He looks back, sees me, and nods. We’ve done this too many times before.
I’m not late or anything. It’s just that I’ve been caught by him before down here and the last time he looked at me was…
I shiver at the thought.
Jonah gets Jack to walk in front of him, along with Maya who walks backwards to continue their conversation. We look totally stupid, but I make it to the right elevator with plenty of time to spare.
I fist pump everyone before stepping into the mirrored elevator.
I’m completely alone, surprisingly. I was expecting Caspain to just teleport in here and start staring at me.
Oh crap, I’m alone! There’s no cameras in here!
“With death it will come, as sure as the night.” This right here is my favorite verse. It makes me feel like I can take on a man two feet above me and win with ease. It makes me feel like I am Corvo Attano and I’m fighting for my daughter.
I lean back on the cool metal railing, feeling like I’m on broadway. No elevator kiss scene could top this. No pin scene could. If I was being recorded, I’d have a billion views.
Just kidding. The elevator stops when I start singing about the east horizon and-
Someone bury me.
“There you are, Neptune.” Aspen Caspian is a few inches from taking up the entire elevator door. “I’ve been looking for you.”
“Oh!” Is all that I can muster. I’m still leaning up against the railing, background music playing in my ear as I await the last verse.
What… we’re on floor thirty-eight. How in the world did he get up here?? I’m so confused??
Murky grey eyes stare down at me, an intoxicating cool grey. His lips are thin and pink, his dark hair gelled back perfectly. I wonder, does he do it or does he have servants who pretty him up?
He’s also standing in the doorway.
Rich men are so weird.
I take a step back, offering the space next to me as a peace offering. He does not take it. He continues staring at me.
I hope it’s not the pants.
I’ve worn pants, like, three times to work because I hate them(I don’t know if you heard) so I don’t know what else he’s staring at. Me? I’d rather be hospitalized.
I mean, he’s not bad looking. He’s just like Handsome Jack if he was cold and cut off and was the size of a gorilla. Like if you made Corvo a billionaire and cut him off from Emily and Jessamine.
Okay bud, my last verse is starting, hurry up.
Finally, he looks behind him, steps in, and comes right by my side. He’s so close I can feel him radiating on me. Down the hall, someone yells to hold it- that’s Martin! My heel clicks as I step forward, a hand coming out and-
Caspian grabs my hand, putting it back by my side.
I expect a feeling of disgust, but how his hand wraps around mine makes me want to giggle.
Ew, no, no, I didn’t just say that. Pretend that never made a thought in my brain.
The elevator doors shut on an utterly confused Martin, surrounded by another coworker I didn’t exactly recognize… nope that's uh… crap, what’s his name?!
I’m still looking at the door when Caspain’s huge body reaches over me and presses Fifty- eight. I get a big fat whiff of man, which smells like… gingham. That’s Gingham Love from Bath and Body Works. My favorite, actually.
I have a million and one thoughts running in my head when a new song blasts in my ear. Kimiko Glenn’s When He Sees Me welcomes my ears with a southern accent and a song I tend to scream in the shower. The thoughts in my head vanish as I see the music video I always imagine with this song.
I’ve always wanted to perform this song somewhere. I’ve always wanted to perform anything anywhere. I didn’t want to be some guy's personal assistant, I wanted to be a singer or an actor. I wanted to show the world my voice and I wanted them to listen. I wanted them to listen to me.
If I wasn’t so afraid I would start on something, I just know I can’t give this job up. The pay is too good.
What if when he sees me,
What if he doesn’t like it?
What if he runs the other way and I can’t hide from it?
What happens then?
Caspian doesn’t talk to me, doesn’t explain why he was looking for me, doesn’t do anything besides stare at me from the corner of his eye. He’s done it so many times I don’t squirm anymore. Ever since I stopped shifting from his stares, he’s done it a lot more.
            I’m not defensive! I’m simply being cautious!
I can’t risk reckless dating due to my miscalculating.
“I don’t think I’ve seen you wear pants before.” Caspian’s eyes leave their favorite corner.
“It’s quite cold outside.” Dark cherry hair finds its way over my shoulder, darker than my maroon shirt. My feet already hurt from my heels and I’m ready to sit down.
Fifty, Fifty- one, Fifty- Two…
Is it just me or has this elevator slowed down? It used to take me to the top in record speed no matter my begging for it to crash. Now, it’s painfully dragging on its railings no matter my begging for it to hurry up.
It’s really stuffy in here. Probably because Caspian takes up the entire flipping elevator.
Okay, I’m dramatic. He’s a big dude, but not too big. About a foot over me, standing at 6’3, and he’s, well, he’s well built. Really well built. Incredibly well built. Intimidatingly well built. No person should have such big arms. It should be illegal.
Wait, everyone shut up, it’s my favorite part.
Some sort of psychopath who escaped from an institution
Somewhere where they don’t have girls!
It’s my turn to stare in the corner of my eye. That part always reminds me of the man I work for.
He’s already staring at me.
Crap. Now I can’t look away.
His face is made of sharp lines, completely symmetrical. Not a dark hair out of place. This time around studying my boss I find his eyebrows are literally perfect. Beefy for anyone else, perfect for his face. He breathes through his nose, and his huge chest rises each time.
The elevator doors open.
I glance towards the door, ready to stick my arm out to say you go first, but he barrowls out the door before my arm raises an inch.
I didn’t want to be stuck in an elevator with you either.
I get the chance to turn off my music while he’s in front of me. I stare at my phone and walk, waiting for Glenn to finish her belt.
Someone who, when he sees me,
Wants to again!
Air fills my lungs and doesn’t exit until she finishes. The final instruments clang and the song comes to a close. I’m by my desk by the time she’s done.
Alright. Time for his coffee.
“Neptune! Neptune!”
I’ve never turned so quickly.
Jonah's suit blinds my eyes for a second, but I recover when he grabs my shoulder. “I need the Celsey file!”
“Huh?” I shoot him a raised brow. We don’t have a meeting with Celsey until three.
Jonah simply looks into my eyes. “Now, Nep!”
Nep.
“Come with me.” I usher him into the filing closet.
Originally, this was meant to be my office, but Caspian had my desk moved into his huge room for whatever reason. Since I don’t see myself leaving anytime soon, I use it as a filing closet even though I have perfectly working drawers right next to me.
Cabinets cover the walls as I start opening random ones. Noise. We need noise.
“What’s going on? Who’d Caspian hurt?” I huff, just above a whisper.
“No, not about him. Not yet at least.”
Oh boy.
Jonah opens a cabinet himself, peering inside. “Y’know that video I posted of us singing Anything You Can Do?”
Oh no. It takes me twelve seconds to turn fully to Jonah.
“No, Caspian didn't see it.”
My shoulder slump in relief.
“Roxie did.”
“Wait, why’s that bad?” Roxie may be a little… passive aggressive, but I can be too. I’m sure she just doesn’t eat in the morning.
“She has that massive crush on Caspian?”
Oh! Girl’s got… interesting taste! “I still don’t see why that’s bad.” I open two cabinets at once.
“She’ll do anything to get your position. She told marketing and HR she thought having partners' songs would be a great way to raise morale.” He runs a hand through his black hair. “So she’s either going with you to outshine you, or she’ll try and pair with Caspian.”
“Can’t I just say no to partners?”
“I don’t know, I just wanted to let you know.” He shrugs, tugging at some files. “Sorry.”
“I don't care. She doesn’t know a thing about Caspian and how he can be.” I walk to the end of the room, trying to actually find the Celsey file.
“Speaking of, why in the world do you still work for him?” Jonah follows me like a puppy. “You could be on Broadway by now, Nep!”
“Maybe not Broadway.” I flip through tons of files before I realize I opened the wrong draw.
“Yes, Broadway. Why are you still here? You know I have that buddy…”
“Thanks but no thanks.” I swing out this particular cabinet by accident, a surge of anger powering through me for just a moment. “I have a reason I’m still here.” 
He motions me to continue.
With a sigh, I start the monologue I’ve prepared for the past year. “I’ve beaten the true pacifist route on Undertale nine times, beaten all the Dishonored games on low chaos four times, Dishonored One even more times, and gotten to OP10 on all vault hunters twice. When I first played Slimer Rancher, I beat it in three hours, hundred percent-ed the Slimepedia in five. You picking up what I’m putting down?”
“No.”
I thumb through files, trying to level the oncoming anger this story makes me exhibit. “I was never interviewed by him, but by his ex-assistant. My first day I was all smiles even though I knew he wasn’t. He took one look at me. One, Jonah. One look and he said I wouldn’t be there at the end of the day. I asked if he was going to fire me, but he said I wouldn’t last and that I would quit.” I bite the words out.
“You’ve been here for two years.” He raises an eyebrow.
“Exactly.” I pluck out the file and begin walking to the door. “I’m lasting. I don’t know how long, but I’m lasting.”
Jonah looks at me with worry, probably thinking I’m crazy for thinking I can handle the Quiet Killer or The Owner or whatever the news is calling him these days. 
“I’ll last if it’s the last thing I mother-fluffing do.”

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