Aamon x Natan Oneshots

Too easy to unlove.

*Natan's pov*

A question always lingered my mind.
A question that I want to be answered.
A question that I hope someone will answer...

In my last relationship, I've given in my all, my everything. I've tried my best to show and express my love for him. I even went pass my limit, just for him.

I know I'm not perfect. Nobody is. I make mistakes too, but I tried my best to make it up to him by writing him long apology letters and buying some gifts.

I know I'm lacking in some things but is my best really not enough? I spent almost all of my savings for him. I cant have any rest everytime we got an argument. I will never be able to once I knew we have argument.

I've had a 1 week streak before of crying every night because of him.

The worse part of all is that, everytime that I thought we're doing just fine, something will happen. An argument will happen. Then he'll proceed to not talk to me for DAYS.

To be honest, I think I have no reason to be happy anymore. Cause everytime I've become so happy, something bad will happen. Enough to overcome the happiness I felt in those few days in just a minute.

Until now, I'm asking myself different questions.

Am I good enough?
Where did it all go wrong?
What if I never did that?
What if I never said that?
What could've been happening to us if that never happened?
Do I deserve love?
Am I actually worth it?

Those are just some the questions that hunts my mind every SINGLE time.

But one questions always bring me tears.

Am I really that easy to unlove?

I need to know the answer.

Did he even tried to fight his love for me even when he felt it slowly disappearing?

Just thinking of this question gives me a heavy feeling.

All I can do right now is to 𝑐𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑒 my eyes. Hoping that one day, maybe it will be answered.

I cant help the fact that I wish I got the answer from him tho.

Everything feels so empty until I heard a familiar voice.

"it cant be him" I say

But then I saw him looking at me with those tender eyes full of love and care, just like how he looked at me when we're still together.

He pinched my cheeks and says "No darling, you arent easy to unlove."

Just hearing that is enough. I dont need any more explanation yet he kept going.

"I truly loved you, I do. You're the most beautiful person I've ever seen. You're so much worth it. We both have mistakes okay? Not everything is your fault. Stop blaming yourself to everything bad that happens to us. You know I'll always love you darling. Always and forever..."

Hearing him say those words in pure and loving tone is more than enough. I finally heard everything that I needed to hear... I'll finally have my peace...

He slowly leaned in for a kiss but before that he whispered something.

"My love for you wont end, Natan." As he said those he once again leaned for a kiss.

But before his lips can even touch mine....

I woke up.

Silly me.

Of course its just a dream.

Why did I expect it to be real?

Maybe its my sign.

A sign for me.

That I am not worth it.

That I am the problem.

That everything is my fault.

I am too easy to unlove that no matter what I did, I'll never be enough.

I'm sorry for everything, Aamon.
Maybe in another life, I'll be good enough for you. Maybe I wont so easy to let go in our next life.

(Lol fun fact, the recent 2 chapters in this one shot and this part is based on my real life experience. I mean not everything that happens in the oneshot but the plot, for example for the last chapter, the plot/theme is "Why cant I be pretty enough for your eyes to no longer wonder around?". Yes I've experienced that. So I'm basically venting while writing silly stories. Never fall in love at a young age :333)