Shahensha's Begum

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN:THE VICTORY OF......

Bakshi Bano P.O.V.

I stood in the darbar,hands behind my back as I faced the throne.My heart racing as I went over Masuma Begum's words in my mind.I clunched my hand into a fist,my nails digging into my palms as anger crusaded inside me,my body rolling back and front on the balls of my feet.

I would never abandoned the mother who blew life into me,the mother who had to leave her husband for years,getting glimpses of him once or twice or thrice a year.While the woman responsible for her pain lived freely and happily in the qila alongside her husband.

Ammi-jaan had sacrificed years of her life that should have been lived with abu-jaan,away and with her family.She walked away from the position of being the head of the haram at Niyazi Qila,she walked away from handling the matters of the haram and did not look back even once.The years of her crying silently when she thought I was asleep,the faraway,foregone look that would fill her eyes when I would be playing in front of her and the constant gazes at the duppata that hung over her chest.Did Masuma Begum think I would forget all of that and be happy with the charity that she would give me.

I walked towards the large scale like the one I had sat on today,standing at the one plate as I held onto one of the chains that held the plate up and tugged at it causing it to go closer to the ground while the other lifted higher.

I heard voice as well as the rsutling of clothes and the chimming of anklets.I could feel the gazes on my back as I stood at the scale,letting go of the chain causing the plates to flutter together.

"Bakshi." Ammi-jaan's voice,filled with urgency and worry came from behind me,"Sab khariyet hai,meri bachi?"

(Is everything okay,my child?"

Her words caused my ribs to tighten around my heart,almost constraining my breaths as I turned to face everyone.When I looked around I saw Hakim Alla,Nusrat Bano,mami-jaan,mamu-jaan,abbu-jaan,Hafiz bhai-jaan,Shahensha Haider,Malika Begum,Hafiza Bano and Masuma Begum.The former of which except the two last people,whom had worried and concern eteched across their faces.The latter two whom looked as if they had achieved some victory.

"Bakshi,kya hua?" Mami-jaan questioned,her face fluttering with worry as her eyebrows pulled together.

(What  happened?)

I looked at the scale behind me,walking so that I stood next to it before facing everyone.

"This scale has always been used to demonstrate the right and wrong to all of us in this Qila.It has shown me how to administrate justice no matter where I am,regardless if it is between a wazir and farmer." I looked at mamu-jaan and mami-jaan who stood with curiosity filled eyes,"Mamu-jaan,do you still trust me to administatre justice here tonight?"

"Of course,I do.There has never been a doubt about your justice."

I gave a nod of my head as I gestured for Ikhtiyar to come forward with a tray which she brought to me,I removed the cover,revealing stones placed on it. 

I pulled out a stone from the tray,holding it in my hand as i turned to face my family,who looked at me with worry shinning through their eyes,"This is for Masuma Begum,who gave birth to me." I put the stone on one plate of the scale before reaching for another stone,"This is for the milk Masuma Begum fed me as long as she did." I repeated my actions,"This is for leaving me in the care of her bandi without worry."

I moved to the next plate of the scale,before reaching for the next stone,"This is for Gulbadan Begum,ammi-jaan,who took a crying child and made that child her own." I put the stone down on the plate,then picking up another stone,"This is for raising me." I repeated my actions,"This is for never letting me away from her." Again,"This is for sacrificing her days with abbu-jaan just so that I would stay safe,just so that I would stay alive." Again,"This is for giving me a loving family." The scale begun to tip down,almost touching the ground,"This is for giving me everything a daughter could ever wish for." Again,"This," I looked at ammi-jaan whose eyes had filled with tears as I put the last stone down,"This is for loving me like her own blood." The scale tipped down onto the floor,while the other scale swayed in the air,"The scales have spoken that the favours are for ammi-jaan."