Once again, I found myself standing beside the newlyweds who were swaying romantically to a love song, their faces beaming with genuine happiness. Despite my best friend's obvious joy with Dev, I couldn't bring myself to share in her bliss. My love for her had blinded me and prevented any semblance of rejoicing; instead, I was consumed by an inner turmoil that left me feeling shattered time and again. As much as it pained me to watch them together, my presence seemed invisible to my best friend - she remained oblivious to my heartache. Though someone else was making her happy, all I wanted was to be the one responsible for putting that smile on her face - even if it meant sacrificing everything else in the process.
Love is often described as a sacrifice, but I found myself questioning just how much I was willing to give up. While my ultimate desire was for her happiness, it came with the caveat that only I could be the source of her joy. Unfortunately, as you may have already surmised, my efforts were not enough to bring about that radiant smile she deserved. Witnessing him draw near to my closest confidant and slowly press his lips against hers felt like a physical blow - one which sent me into a frenzy of panicked breaths and racing heartbeats. Running had always been my go-to solution in times of distress, so I bolted without concern for those around me.
As soon as possible, I needed something strong to dull the pain coursing through me, it seemed too unbearable otherwise. Of course no one cared about a woman who loved another woman suffering from heartbreak- such love was viewed as unnatural and abominable by society at large anyway.
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I cannot recall precisely what I was up to at that moment, for I was inebriated beyond comprehension. However, I do remember swaying my body to a melancholic tune, which felt like an emotional burden on me. Although tears clouded my vision, I continued dancing since everyone else seemed to be doing the same. Suddenly, a stranger whispered huskily into my ear and asked if I would dance with them. The feeling of their voice sent tingles throughout my body- perhaps they were a witch! But being too drunk to care about such things...maybe it was just the alcohol playing tricks on me?
.As I lifted my gaze, my eyes met with the bewitching figure who had cast a spell on me. To my surprise, I was greeted by an angelic being whose piercing blue eyes seemed to hold more secrets than I could fathom. Her cascading brunette locks framed her flawless features and her perfect smile left me momentarily speechless. Although she was undoubtedly breathtakingly beautiful, she wasn't Skylar - the one whom my heart truly longed for.
Despite this realization, I found myself becoming reckless in my pursuit of fleeting happiness without Skylar Gaston by my side. The thought of living a life without her felt utterly meaningless to me.
In that moment, as if under the influence of some otherworldly force, I drew closer to the stranger before me and placed a hand on her waist. It was then that I discovered just how powerful liquor can be - it emboldened me beyond measure.
As we moved together in sync with the music like two happy lovers lost in their own world, people began casting curious glances our way. Some may have been judgmental or disapproving of our same-sex dance partnership but others simply saw us as friends enjoying each other's company innocently.
Regardless of what others may think or say about us, nothing could change the fact that at that very moment we were consumed by euphoria and blissful ignorance towards anything else around us except ourselves and our mutual desire for connection through movement.
.Despite my inebriation, I relished the sensation of another person's warmth enveloping me. Any potential remorse would have to wait until tomorrow; at that moment, my sole aim was to forget the pain in my heart caused by losing the love of my life to a despicable man. But what other recourse did I have beyond shedding tears and drowning my sorrows with alcohol, given the homophobic attitudes prevalent in our society?
"My name is Anna," she murmured huskily into my ear, reigniting those same sensations throughout my body. However, I promptly dismissed them upon realizing they were likely a product of the alcohol coursing through me.
"Valerie," I replied hesitantly - though generally strong-willed, alcohol had a way of rendering me pliable.