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Akhlys lunged at Percy, and for a split second, he thought: Well, hey. I'm just smoke. She can't touch me, right?
He imagined the Fates up in Olympus, laughing at his wishful thinking: "Ok bro......"
The goddess's claws raked across his chest and stung like boiling water.
Percy stumbled backwards, but he wasn't used to being smoky. His legs moved too slowly. His arms felt like tissue paper. In desperation, he threw his backpack at her, thinking maybe it would turn solid when it left his hand, but no such luck. It fell with a soft thud.
Akhlys snarled, crouching to spring. She would have bitten Percy's face off if Theo hadn't charged and screamed a very vulgar word right in the goddess's ear.
Akhlys flinched, turning towards the sound.
She lashed out at Theo, but even with her bad foot, Theo was better at moving than Percy. Maybe she wasn't feeling as smoky, or maybe she'd just had more combat training. She'd been at Camp Half-Blood way longer than Percy. Probably she'd had classes Percy never got, like How to Fight While Partially Made of Smoke.
Theo dived straight between the goddess's legs and somersaulted to her feet. Akhlys turned and attacked, but Theo dodged again, like a matador.
Watching her move while made of smoke reminded Percy of seeing her in battle hiding behind her Invisi-Theo blanket. She had the same determined look on her face, the one that Percy loved so much.
He was so stunned he lost a few precious seconds. He stared at corpse Theo, shrouded in mist but moving as fast and confidently as ever. Then it occurred to him why she was doing this: to buy them time. Which meant Percy needed to help.
He thought furiously, trying to come up with a way to defeat Misery. How could he fight when he couldn't touch anything?
On Akhlys's third attack, Theo wasn't so lucky. She tried to veer aside, but the goddess grabbed Theo's wrist and pulled her hard, sending her sprawling.
Before the goddess could pounce, Percy advanced, yelling and waving his sword. He still felt about as solid as a Kleenex, but his anger seemed to help him move faster.
"Hey, Happy!" he yelled.
Akhlys spun, dropping Theo's arm. "Happy?" she demanded.
"Yeah!" He ducked as she swiped at his head. "You're downright cheerful!"
"Arggh!" She lunged again, but she was off-balance. Percy sidestepped and backed away, leading the goddess further from Theo.
"Pleasant!" he called. "Delightful!"
The goddess snarled and winced. She stumbled after Percy. Each compliment seemed to hit her like sand in the face.
"I will kill you slowly!" she growled, her eyes and nose watering, blood dripping from her cheeks. "I will cut you into pieces as a sacrifice to Night!"
