"Every step you take away from me only drives you closer to the brink of my madness. You belong to me, Winter. Any alternative reality or illusion you hope for- I will destroy them until your very existence is entwined with mine."
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W I N T E R
I did it.
I did what I dreaded the most.
I said yes. And I paced around Precy Herrington's guest room, back and forth in the small area with a set of clothes bunched in hand that I needed to change into. What have I done? Clamping my mouth shut with a hand, I let out a disgruntled squeal.
You have made your choice.
Ivan's stern indication turns my blood to ice.
There's no going back now.
Tossing the clothes aside, I sit on the foot of the bed, legs bouncing, heart racing, and mind reeling. I did right. I convince myself pathetically. There wasn't anything else in the spectrum that I could have done anymore. The future can't be deterred, and the torrent can't be tamed. It was the nature of our verity, and I was helpless against his charms, pledges, and the frenzy of his emotions that stream through me. Ivan doesn't lie. Unlike me, he never suppresses what he feels or means. It's a trait I have grown to be both appreciative and afraid of.
I am trapped by him now that the last of my walls and fences have crumbled. They are now pieces of rubble beneath my feet that Ivan could pick, inspect, and examine. Assess with his intellect that's beyond my comprehension. I know he was manipulative-he has just changed his course from implementing it to solve me like a puzzle to now being in quest of luring me to his demand. I wasn't a blind girl trudging through her destiny the moment my starving soul was tempted by what she had sought for her whole life. His care and attention, though they play a key role in how I react to his rulings. Though I may have digressed, I know Ivan was treating me with deception-making me believe that I had a choice by giving me time, leeway, and a margin to choose from.
There was no retreat or withdrawal. And I saw it in his eyes when I gave him my answer. It felt like a tyranny to give him my heart when I knew he was capable of crushing it in the future. And I was afraid that he might not stop at just that. If he decided to retaliate with hate, he would probably ruin me forever, and yet the one small word comprised of three letters had evoked the kind of forbidden fervor that only exists in myth-or so I had believed.
His darkened eyes, his piercing attention to detail, and the way he tracked my breaths and blinks trapped me in the walls of his own now that he has ravaged through mine. I had been my own person until a few moments ago-and now, it doesn't feel like much.
Fiddling with my hands, I eventually calm down after practicing some meditative breaths. One baby step at a time.
Say something, baby.
I had to physically shake my head to get his broken yet steely whisper out of my head. I could feel, hear, and inhale him everywhere. Even my clothes have attained his scent from his touch-and the taste of caramel lingered on my tongue like a sweet reminder of his presence.
