in the end ⇔ halsey

seven

a/n: what the fucks up this chapter is dedicated to literally the most important person ever aka evie aka inthecalumhood

[APRIL]

i jolt awake from and dreadful dream quickly. my head spins and i can barely breathe. looking over at my phone that had somehow made it to the bedside table, i check to see that it's nearly 9 am. how long was i asleep?

unlocking it, the first thing i see is dani's text i still haven't responded to. the second, is a missed call from my dad. great.

it's been about a week since i moved in with ashley.

dani and i have been best friends since 8th grade. we met during a summer creative writing class when we were 13. since then we were inseparable. talking constantly about how we didn't know how we made it so far in our lives without each other. i love her to death, and would jump in front of a train for her. my first, and only best friend.

i type out a quick response, praying that she was doing something else and i didn't have to respond right now.

after groaning and turning my back away to the door, someone walks in.

"you okay?" ashley's smooth voice cuts through as she sits down carefully on the end of the bed.

afraid of being in such a vulnerable position, i sit up, and mutter a small "yes."

"that's good," she responds. "good morning, by the way."

then the blue haired girl sighs. "ashton and i are still talking about your fall, he thinks it's dehydration, but what the hell does he know." the tone of her voice changes from smooth to rough in seconds.

"are you mad at him?" i mumble.

"i don't know. sometimes he just, makes me so mad, but somehow makes me feel helpless at the same time."

there's an awkward silence as i think of a response. "i can't help you."

"why not? i know we just met or whatever but i feel like i've known you my whole life. i understand if you want to leave though."

"that's not it at all," i pause, taking a deep breath. "it's just, i've never, actually, been in a relationship before. i don't think my relationship advice would be very helpful to you."

all she says is a quiet "oh," then another painfully long silence.

right as i begin to bite nervously at my nails, ashley speaks up. "i'm mad at him for a stupid reason. it will be okay. there's breakfast outside that ash made, if you want to come. then we were thinking about going shopping. ashton said that we dress really similar to each other, so you could pick out things that you think i would like and describe them to me. ashton sucks balls at it, so i think it would be fun with you. what do you say?"

obviously i'm not gonna say no.

"let's go!"

-=-

"okay so it's this olive green t-shirt, kinda see-through, but not that much. flowy, and really soft. feel it." i extend my hand and place the top in ashley's hands as gentle as i possibly can.

"mm, it is quite soft. i like it. and for the rest of the outfit?"

she releases the shirt and i place it in my left hand, holding the other pieces in my right. "really light and stain washed jeans, rolled up at the bottom and with two holes near the knees. super duper cute. and your shoes work with it already!" i look down at her black converse and giggle.

after helping her pick out her outfit this morning, i had already gathered at least one chapter of the book.

"how do you imagine color?" i asked her.

"i know what color looks like, i know what a lot of things look like. i didn't go blind until i was around 8."

this surprised me. my eyebrows shot up as i scribbled furiously in a notebook.

"so that's why you can pick what color you want to dye your hair!" i giggled. ashley joined me with a laugh sounding like little baby bells ringing just quiet enough to fall asleep to.

i think of another question to ask her quickly, and it was stupid, but my curiosity got the best of me. "so what's your favorite color?"

"blue." she says without hesitation. "color is one of the most prominent things i can remember, and in my memories, for some strange reason,"

she pauses.

"everything is blue."

a/n: ahhhhHHHH see what i did there I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF YOU HAVE NO IDEA okay anyway the italics were like a flashback if you didnt get that

hey i love you youre cute thanks for reading this