Midnight Thoughts (vol.2) | Poetry

Emptiness

Dear Lord
Can you hear my soul
Screaming in agony?
Feeling hopeless
Like it doesn't belong anywhere
Not between my kin
Not between friends
That is
If they are my real friends
Growing up
I've become numb
What am I even doing?
Sometimes I ask myself
Why was I born?
Why am I here?
What is my purpose?
I swear, I'm trying
But life doesn't make sense
I don't feel anything
But emptiness
I don't let myself
Fill this emptiness
I can't close my eyes
The need of being vigilant
All the time
Doesn't let me
When did it all start?
I have memories
Where I was a joyful child
Where did they go?
I wonder, if they were real
If I was truly happy once
Or if happiness
Were just moments
Oh, that I remember
Having days full of joy and smiles
Only to come home
As empty and sad
As I was before
Dear Lord
Am I sinning?
For feeling this way?
I wish it could stop
That just once
I could feel like I belonged
Just once.