Dearest - truly flung out of space

38 - The Ceremony

We haven’t told Rindy yet. I can’t break her heart. She’s been talking about the ceremony all week. She’s been telling me how she will wave at me when I walk up the stage and how she will throw tulips at me to celebrate me.
I swallowed every time she brought his topic up. She realised that this topic was never something that I wanted to talk about, but the sweet girl never acted on her thoughts and spoke about it.

I’m in the middle of writing the graduation speech when I suddenly get a call. It’s Derek, a guy from one of my classes. I’m a little confused as to why he’s calling. We’ve never had much contact before and mainly only talked in class for a short while.
“Hello?” I answer as I shive the laptop away from me.
“Y/N, it’s Derek. Hey, am I bothering you?” she asks, and I smile weakly. He’s always been very considerate. I decline his worry.
“Listen, I need to talk to you about the graduation ceremony. You probably saw that we’re only allowed to bring one person, right? The thing is, I’ve often seen you with a blonde woman on campus,” he explains, and I swallow.
“She’s my girlfriend, yes,” I reply. Saying that out loud still gives me butterflies.
“Yes, I know. You two are cute together. Anyway, I sometimes saw a young girl walking with her. I assume it is her daughter?” he asks, and my heart stops. Do I tell him the truth?
“Y-Yes, that is her daughter… Why are you asking?” I whisper with a shaky voice. Carol overhears the uncertainty in my voice and comes over. Her hands rest on my shoulders, and I put the phone on speaker.
“Hello Derek? This is Carol,” she says to make her arrival known.
“Hello Miss, nice to meet you. I’ll make this short. I came out to my mother, and she wasn’t supportive. I decided that I don’t want to invite her to the ceremony. I wanted to let you know that I would give her seat up to the little girl,” he says, and I gasp. I look at Carol, and she’s as surprised as I am. Her hands squeeze my shoulders even tighter, and I whisper into th phone.
“W-What? W…What did you say?” I ask with a quivering voice. I need to make sure that I understand him correctly.
“Yes, the little girl can have my mother’s seat,” he repeats. He notices that I’m taken aback by his words.
“But… are you sure you don’t want to invite anyone?” I ask and look at Carol. Her blue eyes smile at me and she nods. Her presence reassures me.
“My boyfriend lives in Florida. He doesn’t have the money to fly over,” he explains with a sigh. I can hear the pain in his voice. He wants his boyfriend to be with him on this special occasion.
“We can put him on FaceTime,” Carol suddenly says and grabs the phone.
“What?” Derek asks. Now he’s the one who can’t believe it.
“Yes, of course. We can set up the phone. Rindy can take care of that, she would love it,” Carol says with a smile on her face.
“Y-Yes… that.. that would be amazing, thank you, ma’am,” Derek says, and for the first time during this phone call, I can hear the happiness in his voice. 

We end the call, and I can't contain my excitement. I'm allowed to take the two most important people in my life to my graduation.

Weeks pass, and it its the day of graduation. The morning was insanely hectic. Carol spent almost an hour doing my makeup. She needed to be sure that I look great. Rindy spent most of the morning watching a Barbie movie while her mother tried to tie her hair up. It was a beautiful picture, although Carol almost gave up.

2 hours later, we enter the location. It’s a big hall with festive decorations. Rindy is hiding behind her mother, clutching her hand.
“Don’t be scared, sunshine. Look! There is Amelia,” I say and walk towards my best friend. After giving her a hug, Carol walks to our seats. I spot Derek in the hall and walk up towards him. He’s holding his phone in his hand - a facetime with his boyfriend. I smile at him, but he pulls me into a hug. Shortly after, he introduces me to his boyfriend - John. He looks very friendly, with blonde hair and blue eyes. His friendly smile adds to his appearance. He begins to thank me over and over again. I just chuckle and brush it off.

The ceremony starts soon after, and I begin to sweat. I had the amazing idea to write the speech, and before I can back off, I’m being asked to come on stage. As I walk up the stairs, my legs shake more and more. I can’t mess this up. The view on the audience is impressive. Everyone is looking at me. I swallow. Now or never.

We’ve come together to celebrate the end of university. The past 5 years have been a challenge. We’ve made friends and maybe lost them again. We've met new people and gained new experiences.

My voice is shaking, but I force myself to keep talking. As my eyes roam around the people, I spot many faces. Happy ones, melancholic ones, and most importantly, expectant ones.

I can assure you that we all can be so incredibly proud of us. Let us celebrate this wonderful day. I would love to keep talking for hours and hours, but I don’t want to bore you away. In fact, I just want to thank two people. I want to thank my family. And I don’t mean my mother or my father, my grandma or my grandpa. I mean my real family. I am talking about the people I love dearly. I’m talking about my beautiful girlfriend. Without her, I wouldn’t be standing here. Carol, thank you for supporting me in every way. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for picking me up and kicking my ass when I wanted to give up. And thank you, my special sunshine, Rindy. Thank you for making me feel like I have some kind of role model status. Thank you for reminding me why I’ve put myself through this hell. I hope I can be an inspiration for you, little girl. I love you.

I look up from the podium and lock eyes with Carol. For a moment, nothing else exists. It is just her and me. I smile at her and watch her smile back. God, she’s beautiful.

To finish off my wonderful speech, I’d like to sing a song. I dedicate it to everyone here.

I take a deep breath before I take the microphone in my hand again. For a moment, I close my eyes, grounding myself.
The music begins to play, and I swallow. This is my time to shine. Carol never knew I sang. I’ve never actually sang in front of her, and when I showed my musical talent, it was mainly to help Rindy fall asleep.

I open my mouth and start singing. At first, my voice is shaky and scared. But then it’s powerful, I’m in my element.

“I can almost see it, that dream I’m dreaming”

I have the strength to look up. I stare at mesmerized faces. Everyone is fascinated. A small smile creeps up on my cheeks

“There’s always gonna be another mountain, I’m always gonna wanna make it move”

Carol and I lock eyes again. She wipes some tears, and I swallow. Her tears make my heart ache. Even though I know that it’s not her sadness surfacing, my heart aches. I hate to see tears running down her beautiful face.

“Always gonna be an uphill battle, sometimes I'm gonna have to lose”

I end my song and put the microphone down. The whole audience is quiet. My heart is racing like crazy and my hands are shaking. Suddenly, I hear footsteps. I immediately turn my head and look into the eyes of Carol who’s on her way running towards me. Without a doubt, I open my arms and give her the biggest hug ever. 

“You silly girl! You should have told me that you sing! God, you had me flabbergasted!” she whispers into my hair. All I can do is chuckle.

“Are you happy, old woman?” I ask in a teasing way.
“Very, dearest. I’m very happy. But also very proud. So proud,” she whispers back and pulls away from my chest to kiss me. She kisses me in front of all these people.

Carol Aird, my biggest dream is to make you proud.

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(a/n:) Hello, my lovely readers. I am back! I am so sorry that I've disappeared for so long, but the last weeks have been so busy. As i have mentioned in my last chapter, I've been working as a substitute teacher for English. It was such an intense experience with so many happenings in just 4 weeks. However, im extremely thankful that i got the chance to get this opportunity. The lesson planning was stressful, and unfortunately, there were some issues with the cooperation, but the opportunity to finally do what I've been dreaming about and working hard for was almost insane. But anyways, enough about me and all the teaching stuff. While i was gone, I managed to write my bachelor's thesis. I am officially a master student in my teacher training now!
Enough, enough. I hope you're as exciting for the next chapter. Thank you for your support. I appreciate each and everyone of you.
Stay safe, friends.
Xoxo Sarah :)