I Like You. (Camren)

Chapter 4- Concert

I saw a message from Dinah. I haven't heard from her in 2 weeks. I thought she hated me. I would hate me, I broke her heart, and I broke mine in the process. I took a deep breath and opened it.

Dinah: I got tickets to see Beyoncé! Okay I know we broke up but you were like my only friend and I mean its Beyoncé! She's my queen! I can't believe it!

I laughed because I know how much she loves her. I like Beyonce too but not as much as she does. I'm sure she is her number one fan. She has all her CD's. I think once she told me she even has a pillow with her face on it. Man she's so adorable. I'm happy she's happy, that's all I ever wanted for her, is her happiness. I know I'm the one who sort of ruined it.

My notifications stated that I had another messaged. From Dinah.

Dinah: Sorry that was really inappropriate of me.

After a couple minutes of conflicting with myself wheatear or not to message her back, I decide I should.

Me: No its fine I promise, you can talk to me about anything and I know it doesn't seem like it but I don't mind being friends. We were great friends before all this. So I'm happy for you! I bet you're so excited I can only imagine since you're completely in love with her. When do you go see her? I know you're international so it must be hard to get tickets.

Dinah: Yeah I see her in 10 months! I know it's almost a year and I sound like a crazy person but its fucken Beyonce!

We talked for a while about her excitement about Beyonce and just regular conversations. We talked as normal friends would talk.  It felt nice to know we were going to be okay, well at least it seemed like it. We didn't exactly state we were okay.

Well everything until that night. She started answering me with one word responses, simple answers, distant.

Me: What's wrong? Tell me, don't say anything because I know when you get like this. Please.

Dinah: I know I'm not supposed to say this but I miss you. Maybe I haven't moved on from our break up. I cry sometimes, it's hard not to. I'm sorry you asked and I'm just trying to be honest.

Damn. This is what I was trying to avoid. Since the moment she messaged me before I knew it was about Beyonce I thought she was going to declare her love. I can't do this again. I have Lauren, right? But why do I keep thinking of Dinah. I'm not over her I know. I know I still love Dinah, and I miss her everyday terribly. I just know I can't be with her. I can't lie to her.

I can't tell her that she is all I think about too. Don't get me wrong, yes I really like Lauren, she just became my girlfriend and she an amazing kisser, possibly the best kisser I ever kissed. But Dinah, she knows how to use her words. She knows what can make me cry, what can make me laugh. That's why I fell for her because she loves me for me. I love her.

Me: If I'm being honest I miss you too. I love you and just because we broke up doesn't change anything. But I'm seeing someone. I'm really trying to make it work with them, but if in a month I see it's not going anywhere then I will break it off. I really like her but she does live far and our situation to see each other is hard as well. But for now I want to try.

Me: Btw we never got to skype, we said we would, I always wanted to see you and hear your voice.

What if I fall in love all over again? I should have never sent that. I have Lauren, I really like Lauren. I'm trying to make this work I can't do this to her. But hey ex's can be friends right? I'm not cheating. I'm telling her the truth.

Dinah: I will wait for you. You say a month then I'll wait. Even if it turns into 2 or 3 anything so I can call you mine again. Oh and yeah, we can still try to skype but right now I been a bit busy.