A Worthy Replacement

Christmas Special 2024

considering the large amount of fatui that now lived in liyue alongside you and tartaglia, and the fact that holidays were approaching quite quickly, what a better thing to do than do a gift exchange...

... white elephant style.

"man, this is heavy," tartaglia said, grunting a little with effort. "i need to go out and fight a few enemies, i'm getting fatter from all the cookies you baked."

"i told you to be careful, especially since it's holiday season," you huffed, carrying your gift, then taking his package in one arm, lifting it a few times with ease in one hand. he yanked it back.

"t-that's enough, wouldn't want you dropping it," tartaglia said, hastily taking it back into his grasp as he continued to walk with you.

you rolled your eyes endearingly. "twink."

he gave you a look of mock horror and betrayal. "i am NOT a twi-"

"my lady?"

the two of you stopped walking and looked over, seeing alexei and the other recruits by their shared housing complex.

"oh, alexei. sorry, almost walked right by you," you said apologetically.

"no biggie. here, let me take this for you," he said, taking your gift from your hands with ease and instructing the other agents to take tartaglia's to add to the growing pile in the living room.

everyone sat down, you and tartaglia next to each other with alexei on your left and yue next to him. everyone was in their christmas pajamas, and to say everyone looked absolutely adorable was an understatement. here was a group of some of the most well-trained and skilled fatui agents, reduced to sitting around a campfire and a pile of gifts.

"should we draw lots to figure out who goes first," one recruit asked.

"i think lady Y/N and lord tartaglia should go first," another said.

"lady Y/N should go!"

"yes!!"

"alright my lady, you pick first," alexei chuckled.

you looked through the pile, picking an obscure one in the back to open. when you opened it, it was a pajama set that had "I Only Do This Shit To Send Sis To School" written on it. everyone laughed, and you couldn't help but join in too.

tartaglia was chosen to pick next, and he opened a gift which revealed a random cup... which even had coffee or tea stains on it.

"hey!!! that's my mug! who did that," one fatui exclaimed in anger.

"... i ran out of time to get a gift," another said bashfully, making everyone laugh harder.

"guess you have to steal it back," alexei snickered.

a few more recruits picked, getting the items: a pyro-powered hair dryer, coupons for wanmin restaurant, a cookbook, and a crystalized sea ganoderma. alexei picked shortly after, and he pulled out...

... a lingerie set.

alexei's face went bright red, and yue couldn't help but laugh from next to him.

"whoah there," one agent exclaimed.

"who picked that one out?!" another one asked, shocked.

"aw damn it, i wanted that one for you," tartaglia muttered.

"THAT WAS YOU?!" you couldn't help but exclaim.

"no," he said, smirking. "i'm messing with you. that's not mine."

"looks like we know who'll be wearing that in the relationship," one of alexei's recruit friends laughed, making the man stuff the clothing back into the box and close the lid.

"FOR ARCHON'S SAKE! WHOEVER SUBMITTED THIS IS RUNNING LAPS," alexei threatened.

yue picked the next box, getting the gift that you submitted - a super adorable figurine set of mekas that you bought in fontaine. "aww! this is so cute," yue chirped as she opened it.

everyone couldn't help but look at yue when she gushed over the gift, and at that moment, every agent in that room made an unsaid agreement that no one would steal from yue. not just because she was with alexei, but because they didn't want her to think everyone was heartless.

"that's yours, right," tartaglia whispered, which you nodded in response.

"yep. i was gonna give it to you, but now i don't have the heart to steal it from her," you whispered back.

"agreed."

the game continued, with each gift having 3 steals maximum. you ended up with a brand new blade sharpening set, which was actually tartaglia's gift. tartaglia ended up with a new set of earrings, and alexei gave the lingerie away and ended up with some new books to add to his ever-growing collection. yue still kept your cute figurines, of course.

luckily, the guy who lost his mug got it back.

"you know, considering the amount of money we pay you all, i would think you could do better than stealing and recycling each others' stuff," tartaglia huffed, looking at all the recruits who ended up trading for their belongings back (some of whom were unsuccessful to their dismay). "especially after your raise from halloween."

"it was funny though," you said, defending the recruits a little.

"admittedly so," alexei said. "i'm surprised, i thought it would be more chaotic."

"go get your lingerie back," you snorted, making everyone stifle a laugh - yue included.

"hey!" alexei shot you a glare.

that's when there was a ding from the oven in the kitchen, signaling that whatever was in there was done cooking.

"oh! the cookie for the house building is ready," an agent said, getting up and running to the oven.

"house building," you asked.

"it's a tradition from afar! we were going to have a competition for who can make the best house!"

"sign me up," tartaglia said, cracking his knuckles and setting his gift aside.

tldr: he lost since his cookies all crumbled, and boris' house won.

merry christmas.