deal with the devil! | JOKER X READER ✅

CHAPTER 32: blackout.

TW: ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION, DRUGGING VIA LIQUOR

You felt exhilarated as you and Harley walked to your new home. You had never stood up to Joker like that before, and it had felt so fucking good. Somewhere along the line, you had started to think that he was somehow undeserving of criticism. But now, you saw things as they were, and you made sure he did, too. And the fact he would never be able to get the last word was just the icing on the cake.

"I'm so proud of you!" chirped Harley excitedly as she rolled your suitcase. "That shit takes guts!"

"I know. I can't believe I just did that."

"Me neither! But I'm so happy you did. He was just beggin' to be put in his place. He's gonna be thinkin' about you all night now!"

You hoped he did. He needed to mourn what he had lost, since he would never be getting it back. "Yeah, but be probably would've been anyway."

"I like this (Y/N)! Confident, ballsy. I'd like to see more of her."

"Me too."

You weren't quite sure if being with Joker had made you lose yourself. After all, you had always been a little timid, despite your criminal aspirations. But, he surely didn't help you find yourself either. It was so obvious to you that this was your true self; it had just been constantly veiled by whatever unfavorable circumstance you found yourself in. Leaving Joker pushed back that veil.

You didn't just find yourself without him. You found yourself in spite of him.

"I think you will see a lot more of her," you smiled.

"Ugh, I love post-breakup glow ups. It just makes already sexy women even sexier, both inside and out!"

"My glow up is gonna be lethal. I can feel it."

"Oh, yeah. He's gonna be kicking himself every day for letting a girl like you walk out the door."

You felt your phone begin to vibrate in your pocket. So, you instinctively took it out and looked at it.

You saw that Joker's name was on the screen, and, for a moment, you almost wanted to answer the call. You were beginning to wonder if you would always be somewhat tempted by him. You figured that that was impossible, since time apart usually kills all feelings. But, he was such an important part of your life that you couldn't imagine not thinking about answering his call. You wouldn't do it, but you would definitely think about it.

"Don't you dare!" laughed Harley. "I was just congratulating you on standing up for yourself!"

"I wasn't gonna!" You pressed the red button, subsequently pocketing the phone.

"You so were!"

"If that's what you wanna believe, Harls."

You felt your phone begin to vibrate again, so you took it out of your pocket and looked at it again. Sure enough, Joker was calling again. You suspected that this wouldn't stop until you answered, which was the last thing you needed to do at that moment. So, you pressed the red button again and opened his contact. With shivering fingers, you blocked his number.

The finality of the action made you anxiously bite your lip. This was really it. All ties were severed. He couldn't contact you anymore, even if he wanted to. You hoped he wanted to. You hoped that not being able to would destroy him the same way he destroyed you.

   "Atta girl," said Harley while patting your back. "I'm gonna be straight with ya. This is gonna suck for a while. But eventually, you'll learn to deal. You'll be able to see things reminiscent of him without thinking of him. You'll be able to go out and party without feeling like you're cheating on him. You'll be able to live your own life!"