The adventures of the munchkin pie

Chapter two

"Hello good sir. What brings you out in the woods on this fine evening?" said the lady pie. I grabbed her arms and widened my eyes to scare her.

"They're coming," I whispered eerily.

"Who are?" she asked.

"The goblins," I replied.

"Oh don't be silly! Everyone knows goblins don't exist! That's the most preposterous thing I've ever heard."

"No, you mushroom. Goblin is the ancient pie word for dragon. The dragons are coming to eat us all!"

"Would you like to stay in my humble abode for the night? I live in this forest and my humble abode isn't too far from here," she offered.

"You would do that for a fellow like me? How very kind of you!"

"Well, you look like a friendly fellow. Not to mention your scent is delightful," she said playfully. Was that flirtatious? I wouldn't know since I was less than a day old, but I had a feeling it was. I blushed a blue colour and my feet began to sweat uncontrollably. I was so embarrassed. This was so unlike me, I was normally a manly pie.

"What is that orange liquid coming from your feet?" asked the lady pie.

"Oh I just stepped in some dragon poo during my travels."

"I thought dragon poo was yellow?"

"Oh yeah well um this is mixed with a bit of soil since I've been running throughout the wilderness," I stuttered.

"Oh ok. Anyway let's get going. Follow me," she said. "Wait a minute. What is your name?"

"Le Kevin," I replied. I just made that up on the spot since I didn't even have a name. I thought it would suit me since I'm pretty sure my mother tasted French when I ate her, which means I'm French. "And what is yours, m'lady?"

"Peanut," she said with a smile.

"My, what a majestic name you behold," I tried to be a bit flirtatious for the first time in my life. It worked.

"Thanks, Le Kevin."

We then proceeded to walk.

At last, we came to Peanut's humble abode. It wasn't a cactus though. It was a hole.

"Why do you not live in a cactus like a normal munchkin pie?" I asked Peanut.

"I like to be different. Plus, in the middle of the forest, all kinds of dangerous predators come out to play, including dragons."

"That makes sense. Is it cosy?"

"I think you'll find it extremely cosy," she said with a cheeky grin. I liked it.

We descended into the hole slowly. When I entered, the room was covered with rose petals and dead rabbit scented candles. What the mushroom.

"I've been expecting you, Le Kevin," she said evilly. My heart froze. Was she being friendly or not friendly?

"What do you mean? We only just met? Plus I've only been alive for less than a day," I said with fear in my voice.

"In the next few minutes, Le Kevin, all will be revealed. And let's just say, it won't be fun."

Oh my goblin.