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Chapter SEVENTEEN

Clouds are boiling up over the mountains as I drive into Manitou, darkening the world for the usual late afternoon thunderstorm. The light makes all the flowers along his street look brighter, whiter, more mysterious.

I pull into his driveway and sit for a minute, looking at the house. A nasty voice in the back of my brain is telling me it's impossible that Tyler could love me, really love me. That I'm from the wrong kind of world. He's too-

No. I'm tired of listening to that voice. I know where that leads-to a lonely night spent tossing and turning, wishing I was with him. I get out of the car, tug down my tank top and carry my jacket inside with me, thinking it might get chilly later if we sit on the patio, especially if it rains.

At Henry's I let my hair down and brushed it until it gleamed, and it lifts in the breeze as I walk across the yard to the steps. I'm aware of my arms and legs, of my chest and hips, of my face and the angle of my head, as if I am both myself and some observer watching me. Or maybe I'm thinking of Tyler looking at me, and then there he is, at the door, wearing jeans and a t-shirt that fits his broad shoulders and taut belly perfectly. He pushes open the screen door and I see his feet are bare, and the nakedness ignites the spark of my hunger for him again, so intensely I almost can't breathe for a second. My feet keep moving, and I come up the steps, and-

He hauls me up and into him until my feet almost come off the ground, and I fling my arms around his neck, pressing my whole body against his. Our mouths open and tongues meet, and someone is making a noise of longing and relief. Maybe it's me. Maybe it's him.

"Jess," he whispers, pulling back a little, kissing my chin, my throat, his hand cupping my ear, my head. "Jess."

I drop my purse and he shoves the door shut with his foot and backs me toward a room, not the studio. We're kissing and kissing, pulling off each other's clothes as we go. I tug on his t-shirt and he raises his hands. I peel it off, running my palms over his skin and his scars and the hair on his chest. He yanks my top off, walking me backward, kissing me, and then we're standing by his bed. It sits between a pair of windows open to the pale light falling through the trees outside. Everything smells of rain as Tyler pulls the straps of my bra down and bends to kiss my breasts, unhooks my bra, and lets it fall. He travels down, kissing my belly, his fingers on the buttons of my jeans, then those are gone and so are my panties, and he's parting my legs with his fingers. I dig my hands in his hair and pull him up.

"Later," I whisper against his mouth, and unfasten his jeans, skim away his underwear. "Condom."

He falls onto the bed and reaches toward the night stand, expertly grabs one from the drawer and shoves it closed. I'm watching him, absorbing the long lines of his body, his tattooed ribs, the long legs, the proud jut of his cock standing at full attention.

He looks at me, standing naked in the soft light. His voice is hushed when he says, "Look at you. I'm going to remember this forever."

There's something in his face that makes me smile and stretch my arms to the sky, leaning my head back so far that I can feel my hair tickle the backs of my thighs. He lets go of a soft groan. "Come here."

Laughing, I fall to the bed beside him and take the condom out. "Allow me."

"By all means."

I unroll it slowly, aware of his eyes on my body, devouring me. Then he's over me, kissing me, kneeling between my legs. I reach between us and guide him, and then he's plunging, hot and full, into that waiting center of me and I'm finished thinking. I'm only feeling, kissing, touching. My body dissolves into his, his into mine, and all the parts of us explode into molecules that mingle together with the taste of our lips and the smell of rain and the pale light. As we finish, we kiss once more, arms and legs tangled, gently, and all those molecules of the rain and the light and our bones, blood, sex rearrange themselves and settle back into the shapes that are our bodies. We lie panting and entangled.