Ice dancer in the garden of love

Chapter III. Jealousy

Years past and that demon never showed up again. Now I was almost 14 years old. My brother got married, and he and his wife were waiting for a baby. I was still on their tail. I tried to find my own way, but Ryouta never let me leave their side. He kept telling me that we were a family, and family stays united, no matter what. But I felt like I was the fifth wheel at the cart. Besides, they were spending the little money we earned for food for all of us. It would have been easier if they spent money only on them both. It means they could have been appropriately eaten, without the third mouth to feed. But Ryouta won't let me leave.
'Hey, Yumi, why don't you leave during the night? He won't notice until the morning that you left them. Also, you can write some sort of note and shit like that.' Ryma whispered to me, although she knew no one could hear her.
'I can't, Ryma. I promised my brother I won't leave them. Plus, I'm sure Ryouta will search for me.' I told her a bit sad. I knew my brother will come after me. I felt that deep in my heart. Although he got blind while we were young, he still kept me by his side. But, maybe this was for the best for both of us. 'Ryma, let's leave tonight. I can't make his family suffer like he did years ago...'
'Are you sure about this? You said earlier that your brother will search for you.' She reminds me of myself. She sounded a bit sad and unsure.
'I'll leave a note for them. The little child has the right to live a sweet life, and he deserves to have both his parents by his side. If I die, then he won't find out about his aunt. This is not a significant loss. But if he dies before he is even born, Luna and Ryouta will be destroyed... I don't want to hurt them, ok? I just can't see them sad...'
Ryma didn't answer me. She had the same opinion I had. But still, I could tell that she disagreed with me at some point. It was like she was hiding something from me.
'You never give up this fast. What's wrong? Do you sense something wrong?' I asked her, hoping she will tell me what the matter is. But, again, she didn't speak. 'Come on, don't give me the silent mood. You know I hate it. What's going wrong with you?' I tried again, this time, a sigh made himself heard.
'You want to know what's wrong with me? I'll tell you then! I'm jealous! I'm jealous that you can think about someone else, not just at yourself. When I was alive, I let one of my baby brothers die to save myself. You are so kind and gentle to others, I was not!' She almost yelled at me. I was able to feel what she felt a long time ago. She was selfish, and she lost her baby brother because of that.
'The past is the past, and it should stay in the past. You have a new chance to do the right thing. After all, I always followed you, remember? You give me the last advice, you help me pursue a path... and everything you advised me to do was reasonable. You have the opportunity to avenge your brother. Don't waste it because you're captured by the past.' I told her calmly. 'Just let that memory go and live for now. It will be better. You will feel better.'
'Easy for you to say, Yumi. I just can't erase the image of my brother in a sea of blood. I saw him, and it was the scariest scene I ever saw.' She told me. Her voice sounded a bit scared and nervous. I guess this is the first time she ever talked about it. It must have been hard for her to tell me this because now she was really silent.
'Look, because you admit you are the one in fault for your brother died, I'm sure his spirit feels much better now. Now all you have to do is to let him go, let the memory of his death go.' I tried again to calm her down; hopefully, this time, I could succeed. Because of her sadness, I wasn't feeling comfortable, and this could wake up my brother.
'Yumi, just leave me alone, ok? I won't listen to you, you little brat. I already told you, I can't forget that image.' She lost her temper for a minute and yelled at me, but I didn't mind. I knew from the beginning of the conversation that she will have this reaction at the end. She always locked herself and never spoke to me about herself and her life when she was still alive. That's why I was sure it would end like this. But this time, it was a word too much.
'Listen up, you unfaithful spirit! I am your guardian, and I am tired of listening to you, calling me a brat, and God knows how. Learn how to treat someone who helps you with respect! I respect you and listen to you, but just now, it was too much for me. We both share the same body, and we have to take care of it, but your temper is merely killing me. And because you feel bad for what happened ages ago is affecting the body. Forget about that and focus on the present, or that hunter will find us.' I spat out in anger. She just made me lose my temper. I never yelled or showed how much she upset me with her remarks, but now, because of the shiver my body has, I just had to say what I said. 'Ryma... I'm sorry... I'm just worried about both of us and my family. Please, let's work together until we kill that hunter... ok?' I whispered to her. I knew I upset her with my remark.
'I never realized that my way of treating you is bothering you, Yumi. You never told me that I'm mean, so I just keep it like that. And for your body... It will be fine once we both calm down. Look, I will try to forget the past, ok? You're right, our priority is to kill that hunter.' She answered like she was almost human. And she even changed her aura, it was no longer that cold as usual. She admitted I was right. What just happened to her? Just because I yelled at her, she changed like that? Gosh, I should have done this a long time ago.
Before I realized it, my body has stopped from its shivering, and a small smile has made himself noticeable on my face. The fact that Ryma was finally listening to me made me really happy. I felt one she gave me right that from now on, we won't fight anymore.