Phlox

{chapter 1}Only The Beginning

"MARIAH, DAMMIT MAKE THE BABY STOP CRYING." That only made her cry worse. I try to rock her a little, that seemed to quiet her down. I look back at my husband. He looked tired, stressed. We never planned on having a baby, but that's what happens when things get..... Heated at home. I look back down at the baby girl. She has beautiful blue eyes, her lips curve like mine in a perfect 'O'. She was perfect, but we have no money or place to take care of her. We have been driving in the hard rain and snow for 3 hours. We are going to the village right out side of the Canadan borders. We plan to leave her on the door steps of any home. At first I was terrified of the fact but Darren was right. We are not ready for a child yet. So we plan to give her away, for her sake. I hug her tight so that she has warmth. I wrapped her in a pink blanket and I have her black hand crafted basket. I look at her hand. And she was gripping my finger. I notice the golden bracelet that my mother gave me when I was 5. It had 'Phlox' carved in white. I used to love the smell and many colors that the Phlox flowers would produce. They were my favorite.

"We are here Mariah, we need to find a nice home"

"OK Darren, I hope her new parents treat her greater then we will or would."

I start to cry. I notice I am about to give up a life that I and my husband created. I know I won't be a great mother. But hopefully she comes to realize that I did it for her to survive.

We stop in front of a 1 story home. It looked like a small cottage. I wanted my baby to have a great life and parents to aid her. I lay her in the basket and touch her cheek. Her cheeks are red from the cold temperature. I reach into my pocket and pull out the note. On the envelope it says ' To Her New Parents' in red ink. I lay it on her feet. I kiss her on last time and knock loudly on the door. I run to the car and get in. We start to speed away. I look back out the window and see a woman with red hair and a nice figure look around then down to the baby. She waits then takes the basket by the handle and takes her inside. I didn't see the rest because we pulled off into a wall of trees.

"Mariah we did the right thing, we need to forget her and move on, she would have pulled us down, baby I am sorry". He moves his hand to my knee. I swat his hand away.

"I did it because I knew I wouldn't be a great mother Darren. I am only 19 and we just had her three weeks ago. I didn't do it because I knew she would weigh us down, I did it so she could live a happy life. Not for someone as selfish as you, you prick!"

"Mariah we both made a mistake and she is in better hands now. The little twit would have died anyway if it wasn't for the doctors to save her from choking to death on her on cord. Now we can be free have each other."

I look out the window and start to fell tears drop down my face. I should have left him when I found out I was pregnant. He freaked out and almost hit me square in the stomach when I was 6 months. I knew he would be selfish. I would love to have her in my arms again. But whats done is done. No turn backs.

I read the sign that says 'leaving Canada'. I will never see my Phlox every again. I soon drift to sleep.....