20 years. Cimorelli, as a band, had broken up 20 years ago. After 2 albums, and 4 years of great success, in 2017, the band adventure had come to an end. Katherine would have liked to think that, after that, her life could just have gone back to normal, but it never did. Because no matter how much she hated arguing with Christina and complaining about her bossy manners, no matter how unhappy she was to see the consequences of fame on her younger sisters, those years remained the happiest experience of her life, but also something that ended in tears and tragedy. And she had never stopped blaming herself for it. Maybe she could have done something to keep that from happening? Maybe it was a consequence of something she did wrong? No, she knew she shouldn’t think like that. But still. When such things happen, it’s impossible not to wonder what God’s message here was, what His aim was when he decided this would happen to their family and put an end to everything they had worked for all their life, all while destroying their family.
She took her phone and dialed Lisa’s cell phone number. It was 4 pm in New York, so she probably would be able to answer her call, at that time, she normally was done with picking up her kids from school and they were probably doing their homework which somehow guaranteed a calmer phone call.
“Kath! It’s been a while!” Lisa said, in an enthusiastic voice. Kath loved calling Lisa, because no matter what, through all those years, they still were able to talk about anything, and kept each other updated regularly.
“Yeah, how have you been, little muffin?”
“Great, the kids are doing amazing, and the children I’m teaching piano to are really improving a lot, especially one, I think she might have a bright career ahead of her. It feels good to share my love for music, and Ross is being really supportive, I don’t know if a better husband exists on this planet, honestly. Oh, speaking of perfect husbands, how is Skyler doing? And how is Mom?”
“Skyler is doing great, thank you. I saw Mom last week, she’s really tired, but she’s doing ok, but you know her, she hasn’t been the same since Dad’s death, I think it’s really hard for her. Skyler and I are thinking of making her move in with us, I think she needs people to rely on, and since we’re the only ones around at the moment…” Katherine didn’t mean to sound resentful there, but it was true, since their father’s death the year before, she had been the only one taking care of their mother. Not that it was something she didn’t like to do, but it all seemed a little unfair to her, that she had to be the one in charge, simply because the others were too far away or too lazy to do it.
“Kath you know I would help you if I could, but now would be the worst moment to move back to Cali, with Ross’s job and the kids’s school and…”
“I’m not asking you to move back to Cali Lise, I know you can’t, I’m sorry if I sounded like that it’s just that sometimes I just … I wish she was still here…”
“I know. I wish that every day too. She would have known what to do, and she certainly would have helped. Have you seen Nick recently?”
“I saw him at church last Sunday, with his wife and their twin daughters. They looked happy.”
Nick Reali. He had moved to her neighborhood a few months before and she still really wasn’t sure why. She hadn’t talked to him in years. Since the funeral, actually. Since she had to keep her own father from punching Nick’s face in front of their whole grieving family. The thought of this moment made Katherine shiver. Those were the darkest times for the Cimorelli family, and she honestly wished she wouldn’t have to see Nick’s face every Sunday, because he was a bad, very bad memory, like a ghost from the past, coming to torture her. Her education had made her a forgiving and loving woman, but there is just so much anyone, even the most kind-hearted person, can take. She could still remember the day that changed everything for them all. The point of no return. That letter she found, on her bed, of Nick telling Christina it was over, with a note from Christina. The girls were home for the first time in 8 months after a very very tiring wolrd tour. “I am sorry. You’ll carry on without me. I love you.”. She hadn’t understood at first. She remembered thinking her sister probably just had left that here by mistake. She hadn’t tried to wake Christina up, she was apparently asleep, in her bed, looking very peaceful. Maybe if she had reacted more quickly, all the pills her sister had taken wouldn’t have time to soak in. She could have saved her, most probably. But it took her 40 good minutes to realize what Christina meant. It took her Amy saying “I heard Christina cry last night. She really didn’t sound ok.” It took Dani insisting she woke Christina up because she needed to show her some amazing review of their latest concert in Moscow. But Christina never woke up.
Out of all of the sisters, Kath was the one who remembered Christina’s dark teenager times the most, and those times she was so desperate about boys she stayed laying in bed for hours, those times they used to talk a lot, those times when she would come to her and explain why her life wasn’t worth living anymore. But she thought that that Christina was gone. She thought that the bossy and confident Christina she had been replaced by when she was around 20 was the only remaining Christina, and not a façade. She knew her break up with Nick would affect her, but she would never had imagined that she could go to that point. But is it something you can ever imagine?
“Kath, are you still here?” she heard Lisa say.
“Yeah, sorry, I just got distracted. What were we saying, already?”
She wiped a tear away and tried to get herself together. Christina would have yelled at her for being too emotional. Oh the irony.
