Chapter 3 - Snake Hickeys Never Fade

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My head swam with lush thoughts of my lips on hers as I staggered about the room. My limbs felt weak and uncoordinated, my vision blurred, but even so, a long forgotten confidence surged through me.

The feeling was unmistakable. I was drunk.

And not the light buzz 'I'm the life of the party' tipsy. It was a full on, boastful, 'I can conquer the world' hammered. At that moment I would have agreed to scale a mountain or have a bare-knuckle fight with a minotaur or ... I looked over at Medusa who sat in her tight, tight police uniform, her bosom standing in attention for the babes in blue.

Babes in blue?—what the hell was wrong with me?

Whatever it was, Medusa was clearly affected too, because she rolled about on the bed, her hands rubbing down the sides of her long, lush body. "You know," she said, her finger circling as she tried to point at me, "You're really cute for a human." She burst out laughing, "And I should know. My first kiss was with Adonis." The finger that had earlier failed to point at me hooked onto the top button of her blouse. With a tantalizing swirl, she undid it, revealing the nap of her soft brown neck.

She undid a second button.

Medusa was hot. I don't just mean beautiful—I mean, pulsating, volcano erupting, hurricane inducing, Armageddon inspiring hot! The same finger that did that thing with her blouse's button invited me to come closer.

Hellelujah!

We kissed. And not just kissed. Our lips pressing hard against one another as we fell into each other, two starved lovers finally getting the chance to indulge in a buffet of lust. I held her tight in my arms, pressing her body against mine as her snakes ran through my hair as little tingly lipless mouths gently nipped at my cheeks and neck.

My head whirled with thoughts of lust and desire. Oh my god-less, it has been too long since I've felt the touch of another and there was so much I wanted to do, to feel. This was what poets meant when they talked about aching loins.

"Oh Jean," she said.

"Oh Medusa," I replied, my hands finding their way under her shirt and up to her, "OWW!" I cried out grabbing my ear.

"What? What happened?"

My fingers touched something wet and, when I looked at their tips, I saw blood. "I think Marty bit me," I eyed the rattle snake and the smug look he gave me confirmed my suspicions.

"Oh Marty," she hissed, continuing to unbutton her police uniform, "He probably just got lost in the moment."

"Yeah, the moment..." my voice trailed off as she took off her shirt. I grabbed my own shirt, seeking to pull it over my chin, when the silver ring that Bella gave me the last time we met caught on the collar. I looked at the metal band, rotating it with my thumb. Oh Bella, I thought. What am I doing?

Her last words ran through my head as I stared at Medusa. 'Be happy,' she said. Certainly doing what Medusa wanted me to do would make me happy. At least for a little while. But still—it was only seven months ago that I learned Bella was alone in the void that once-upon-a-time was Heaven, while I was stuck, mortal on Earth. I have been told by an entity who happened to be present at the beginning of time that it was damn-near impossible for us to be together again. But damn-near impossible is not impossible.

But Medusa was here and now ... While I stood looking at the ring, I hardly noticed Medusa undoing my belt buckle and pulling down my pants. OK—if I'm honest, it was more like I pretended not to notice as the debate played itself out.

Just when I was about to succumb to the here and now, the door burst open and Astarte rushed in. "Jean! There's something going on that is not..." she stopped, noticing the topless Medusa that sat on her bed. With a lustful smile, she disrobed with an unnatural speed. "Oh, this reminds me of Atlantis."

"What ... Just like that ... you walk in and start taking off your clothes?" I said.

"Oh, Jean—two is a moment, but three ... that is an event." She let the last word linger like the vibrations of a recently rung bell.

"I don't want an ... an event!" I said getting up to my feet as I pulled up my pants. Rather, I tried to pull up my pants but only managed to get them over my knees before falling face first onto the ground.

Medusa burst out laughing, her finger unsteadily pointing at me, "You ... you ... fell!" she shrieked between drunken guffaws.

Turning over with all the grace of a beached turtle, I managed to get my pants on and—still on my back—pointed up at the half naked succubus. "What's going on?"

Astarte shrugged as she fell into Medusa and said, "Who cares?"

"No," I said with far too much force in my voice, "You came in here to tell me something. What was it?"

Astarte looked at me in annoyance. "Silly, stubborn human. Fine ... I came in here to inform you that everyone is acting weird out there. Like they're all ... they're all ... Oh Marty," she said petting the snake, "How have you been?"

I never thought that seeing a viper attached to a topless gorgon being petted by a half-naked succubus would be such a turn-on because—well—my imagination was frankly not good enough to have ever conceived of such a situation. But it was ... and it took every ounce of my willpower not to jump in there and have the night of my life. Instead, the sensible part of my brain kicked in and stopped me.

By the GoneGods, I hate the sensible part of my brain.

"I need to sober up," I said as I put on my collarless black jacket. I grabbed my cell phone and headed out the door.

"Wait?" moaned a disappointed Medusa. "What about our non-date date?"

Don't say it Jean. Don't!.. "Ahh, I'll call you." Damn it! I thought as I took one last look at a sight that a thousand ice-cold showers would not temper.

Hellelujah!   


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