Adventures

Coffee

"Meng? Uy! Meng?"

Kuya Wally's voice snapped me out of my blank stare. I didn't notice that I was in some sort of "daze" for the past few minutes.

"Okay ka lang ba?" He asked. "Parang parati ka nalang tulala ah." He added.

Among my three kuyas in the Juan for All, All for Juan segment, I was closest to Kuya Wally.

"Opo, okay lang po ako." I said. Kuya Wally didn't look convinced though. If there was someone on set who knew the real Meng, that would be him.

"Di ako naniniwala. Parang may problema ka eh." He said. "Kanina ka pa tulala, walang imik. Sinasabihan ka ni direk ng mga dapat mong gawin mamaya, pero oo ka lang ng oo." He added.

I sighed heavily. Yes, something was off about me. Yes, something just didn't seem right.

I wasn't the type who'd usually share my problems, but I trusted Kuya Wally enough to open up despite all my hesitations. Kung kaya ko lang naman kasing mag-isa, di na ako magsa-share sa iba. 'Yan si Nicomaine Dei. A self-proclaimed introvert.

"Si Alden po kasi.." The moment I said his name, Kuya Wally teased me. He knew that we were seeing each other off cam, so he liked teasing me whenever Alden was being talked about .

"O, bakit? Anung nangyari?" He asked.

"Alam niyo naman po na busy siya di ba? Di na nga po siya nakakapag-Kalyeserye dahil nga sa sched niya." I said. "Hindi ko po alam eh.. parang.. nahihirapan po ako." I added.

"Huh?" Kuya Wally was confused. "Bakit ka naman nahihirapan?" He added.

I shrugged. I didn't know if I had the right to feel what I was feeling.

"Nasanay lang siguro ako na parati kaming nag-uusap, na parating nagtetext. Ngayon po kasi parang hindi na kami ganun kadalas mag-communicate. Parang once in a blue moon nalang po." I said, remembering all the days and nights I checked my phone every once in a while to see if he texted or called.

Much to my dismay, the text and call alerts came around 2-3 hours after each other or when I was already asleep.

"Alam mo, Meng, hindi ka nahihirapan. Na-mimiss mo lang talaga siya." Kuya Wally said. "Sa araw araw na magkasama tayo dito sa trabaho, alam kong si Alden ang isa sa mga dahilan kung bakit nasisiyahan ka sa ginagawa mo." He added. "Yang mga kilig kilig niyo sa split screen, alam kong pandagdag inspirasyon yan sa'yo. Kaya normal lang na ma-miss mo siya. Araw araw mong nakikita eh."

I nodded at what Kuya Wally said. I guess I just missed everything about Alden. Yung pagka-tisoy niya, yung eye smile niya, yung dimples, yung mga pick up lines niya.. Ano ba naman 'yan, Meng? Ba't ang clingy mo?

It was just difficult being away from him because it seemed as if I had left a part of myself with him.

Though my mom would always tell me that my happiness should not revolve around one person, I guess I was just too attached to Alden that I couldn't help but lose a part of myself whenever he wasn't around.

"Siguro, di lang po ako sanay na di siya nakikita.." I added. Kuya Wally patted my knee in an attempt to comfort me.

"Siguro nga." He affirmed. "Yan din kasi ang mahirap kapag artista kayong dalawa. Bukod sa hindi niyo malayang magagawa ang mga bagay bagay na gusto niyo, tulad ng pag-date kung saan saan, pati ang oras na dapat para sa inyong dalawa ay nawawala na rin minsan." He added.