5SOS imagines and preferences

You're worth it (Luke Hemmings)

Story line: Luke sees your scars for the first time and you're afraid he's going to leave you.

AN: This story contains content that might be triggering so please, don't read it if you're unstable. Also, if you want to talk sometime, I'm here for you, guys. I'm no expert but I'll listen to you if that's what you need.

I felt Luke's hands and the hem of my shirt, trying to take it off, and I started to panic. Went we started to make out on the couch, I didn't think if it went further, he was going to see my skin; and my skin was the last thing I wanted Luke to see. Maybe it was because I was too aroused to stop but I let Luke take my shirt off and for a few minutes, he didn't say anything. I wasn't entirely sure he had his eyes open. But finally, I felt as one of his hands stopped his trail and started caressing one of my scars. We opened our eyes at the same time and for a moment, our eyes met but soon enough, his eyes looked at my stomach and he couldn't hide his expression of surprise and confusion. A sob escaped from my mouth, which I quickly covered it with my hands. I grabbed the shirt and I made an attempt to wear it again, but Luke grabbed my wrist and stopped my movements. "Don't", he said with a mumble. He kept touching my scars, like he was fascinated but I knew he wasn't, he was hurt and causing him pain was giving me more reasons to keep doing what I was doing. Luke finally stopped and when he raised his head to look at me, I saw pain and disappointment in his eyes. I pressed my lips together, trying not to cry more but seeing him like that, it was killing me. And the worst of all was that he was going to leave me after that. He was going to grab his things and disappear. Luke was the best thing that ever happened to me and losing him was also losing myself.

"Please don't leave me", I said between sobs. Luke frowned a little bit, gasped and closed his mouth, not knowing what to say. When my tears increased, he pulled me into his chest and whispered to my ear that he wasn't going to leave me. "You will. You're scared", I muttered.

"I'm not scared", he answered after grabbing my shoulders and pushing me away a little bit so that way he could see me. "I'm not, I promise", he assured me but I didn't believe him; his face was telling another thing. "I'm just worried, Y/N. I didn't have a clue about this", he pointed out my scars, "and I feel guilty because I should have known". i was going to reply, because he didn't have any guilt but Luke pressed his index finger in my lips, shutting me up. "You know you're perfect, right?". I shook my head, I wasn't. Luke placed his hands in my face and made me look at him. "You're perfect, at least, you're perfect to me. You're unique, you're beautiful, you're funny, goofy... God, you're everything I ever wanted and no one can replace you".

I didn't know whether believe him or believe he was lying to me to make me stop but, whatever it was, at that moment felt good. I wrapped my arms around his body and I hugged him while I cried a bit more, getting rid of my fear of him leaving me. "Please, promise me you'll stop and if you ever feel bad, you'll talk to me. I'm here for you, baby". I promised him in a mumble and I fell asleep on his arms while he sang one of his songs in my ear and, for a few hours, everything was calm. But when I woke up the next day and I reviewed the night in my head, I realized Luke and I didn't have sex after all. It could mean a lot of things but in my head it meant that he didn't want to touch me. After all he saw, he didn't want to touch me anymore. I turned my head a little bit and I saw him peacefully sleeping and I realized that a guy like him couldn't be with a girl like me. It was mathematically impossible; I was nothing compared to him. I wasn't beautiful, I didn't have any good skills and I was for sure replaceable. If I disappeared in that moment, Luke wouldn't have any problem to find a better girl. He deserved a better girl.

I carefully got out of bed and went to the bathroom. I closed the door and looked in a drawer the knife I had left there a few days ago. When the blade touched the skin of my arm, I felt relieved. The pain was disappearing, as well as concerns. I didn't realize that Luke had entered the bathroom until the blade disappeared from my hands and a towel was wrapped around my wrists. When I looked myself into the mirror, I saw my eyes full of tears, my lips were trembling and for the first time in my life, I didn't recognize myself.

"It's okay", he said. "You're going to be okay. I'm not giving up on you, Y/N. I won't stop until you realize you're worth it".