Obstruction

Crying over You

- The Stage Dolls, Crying over you -

https://open.spotify.com/track/4balC1LUVQazE4TAjImcrZ

(A/N:
So... this is a song by a Norwegian artist, Torstein Flakne, who is from my own home town.
It is one of my absolute favourite heartbreak songs. Please listen to it.
I think it suits our communicationally challenged pair.
At the moment I just want to jump in there and smash their heads together, but they kinda need to figure it out on their own...)

- January 20th -

There was a lull in our practice, but for a change we were all four gathered in the band room.
We were also sat quietly catching up on coursework. Simon and I were reading up for a written assignment. Ethan was trying to memorise musical notes and Oddball was - as usual - completely unable to sit still. He had a rubber ball that he kept boncing against the wall with a loud, repeated 'thwack'-noise.
Ethan gave him an annoyed stare.

"Odd! Can you calm your fucking AD/HD for five minutes," Ethan muttered.

Oddball just grinned. And continued bouncing the ball untill he had all of us looking at him.

"So. You asked her out yet?" Oddball asked with a smirk at Ethan.

My head automatically snapped up to face him before I could stop myself. Ethan thankfully wasn't looking at me to see the shock on my face.
But I saw the way he suddenly blushed.
The very small tell-tale smile on his lips.
The way his eyes sparkled.

And my world came crashing down. My heart plummeted into my shoes and somehow everything good in the world disappeared. I felt my face contort and forced myself to ignore the big gaping hole in my chest.

Quickly I rearranged my face into a semblance of normal.

Ethan raised his face to shoot Odd a look I couldn't quite pinpoint.
He shrugged a signal that he wasn't going to say anything.

"Do we know her?" Simon asked suddenly interested and leaning forwards.

"Maybe Izzy has ideas of how you could ask?" Odd continued nodding towards me with a smirk.

I stopped myself before responding with a warning look back at him.

"For fucks sakes, Oddball ... this isn't middle school," Ethan muttered looking even more embarrassed.

I felt conflicted.
I knew that fucking string quartet would be trouble.
Where else could he have met someone he had enough in common with to want to ask out?

Yes, I wanted Ethan to be happy. But I also wanted him to want me.
I fought back a feeling of hurt pride.
I had no rights.
He didn't know how I felt about him.
But still.
I imagined having to see him date someone, kiss someone, smile at someone as if she was his whole world and I didn't like it.
Not even a little bit.

Odd raised an eyebrow and smiled mischeivously.

I chose to turn my face away.
I wanted to signal that it was none of my business when I actually just wanted to scream out that he was blind, stupid and very, very bad at taking my hints.
Very vague hints.
Mostly in the form of on-stage flirting and silly laughing at his jokes.
But hints none the less.
Hints I wasn't sure if I actually wanted him to get.
Besides.
I worried that my voice wouldn't carry.

My face felt like it was made of tissuepaper, thin enough to tear with the smallest movement.
The feeling of jealous anger sat like a rock in my chest.
Whoever this girl was.
I wanted to rip her face off.

I turned back down to my textbook about colour psychology to try to calm myself. I was suitably enough on the chapter about green.

"Why don't you just make it a double date? Izzy could ask whoever it is that she's been mooning over, " Simon grinned.