Innocent Sorrow (D. Gray Man Fan-Fic)

Chapter Twenty-Four~

~~Allen's P.O.V~~

I sat with Carlie in the dining hall. She was still clearly upset about Lavi's departure, but so were the rest of us. Lenalee and I were upset too. Even Kanda was affected, though he wouldn't admit it. We'd tried everything to cheer everyone up, but Lavi was the only one in our group who could really manage that, especially at a time like this.

Carlie had been laying down in bed most of the time now. She complained of stomach pains and threw up every once in a while. Was it because she was so devastated and upset of Lavi's departure, or if she was really sick, I didn't know. But I was still worried for her. Not because I still kind of had a crush on her, but because she was still a good friend of all of us. I stayed with her almost all the time, with the exception of sleeping (I either went back to my room, or just slept in a chair in her room) and showers or baths. A few times, Lenalee had come in to help her with that part because she felt she was too weak to go herself.

It seemed Carlie was just slipping away, little by little. She hardly talked anymore, except when thanking someone for helping her or telling me what she wanted to eat. She certainly didn't smile anymore, but she cried often. I felt bad. How could someone whoonly knew someone else for about six months, could be so in love already? I was almost, slightly just jealous. But it felt wrong to be. Lavi was my friend, and Carlie was his girlfriend. Though, I did remember a time when Lavi and I spoke about her, about a month or two into their relationsip. 

"Don't ask my why, or how.. but I can just see Carlie in the rest of my future." Lavi had said once with a smile. The sentence had made my stomach churn.

"Why's that?" I asked anyway.

He shrugged. "I don't really know.. maybe, it's just because I want her to be, or what.. but, I want her to be."

"So, you're thinking of proposing or something?"

"No, no.. it's still too soon for that and the old panda would probably have my head if I tried something so 'wreckless' and 'stupid' to a bookman." 

I nodded slowly and he laughed faintly. "But even just having her around would make it better.."

Thinking about it now, it made my stomach churn even more with either hate or disgust. What it's done to Carlie. But, I know he hadn't done it on purpose, otherwise those words would have been lies. 

The redheaded girl in front of me got up suddenly, leaving her soup. I stood up as well, and walked with her back to her room. She kept her head bowed and a few small tears were in the corner of her eyes. She unlocked the door and I opened it for her. She suddenly got dizzy or something because she suddenly started to fall. I caught her in time though before she crashed to the floor and she sighed faintly in relief. 

"Thank you.." She spoke quietly, almost inaudible.

"Not a problem." I smiled faintly at her and set her down in her bed gently, pulling the covers up to her shoulders. I smiled at her again before turning around, figuring I should sleep in my room. But she grabbed my wrist gently, looking up at me. 

"Please, stay?" She asked faintly and I nodded slowly. 

I thought she meant she just wanted me to stay in the room, so I went to sit in the chair but she pulled me closer to her with as much strength as she had. I'd fallen back onto the bed, and she hummed quietly as she snuggled closer, wrapping my arm in both of hers.

It felt warm and comfortable, sitting like this and she eventually fell asleep like that. She nuzzled her face against my arm and I rubbed his back gently with my free arm. I kissed her forehead gently, before frowning at what I was doing. This felt wrong, but.. was it? Was it wrong to be cuddling with a girl who was simply upset by her boyfriend's permanent departure? What about if that boyfriend was my best friend? 

I liked Carlie, but I wasn't too sure about all of this. 

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I woke up, still in Carlie's bed, but Carlie was gone. I sat up, assuming she was in the bathroom. I got up to check, but she wasn't. I blinked and left to Lenalee's room. I passed Lavi's empty room, with nothing but a bed and a window in there now with the door wide open. I sighed faintly, but continued to walk. I knocked on Lenalee's door and she almost immediately answered it.

"Do you know where Carlie is?" I asked in a hurry.

"She went to Komui because she felt sick and threw up again." 

I sighed faintly in relief. "Thanks Lenalee." 

She nodded and I left to Komui's office. I knocked on the door gently before opening it. Carlie sat on the couch, with her hands between her thighs. She stared at the ground with a blank expression and her face was paler than usual. 

"What's wrong?" I asked as I sat beside her. She flinched slightly under my touch, something she'd never done before and I blinked.

Komui looked between Carlie and me. "Is it you, then?"

"Is what me?" I blinked before looking at Carlie and then Komui, both looking somewhat shocked and upset. "What the hell's going on?"

The next two words muttered from Carlie's mouth made my blood turn cold and my mind went blank.