First Comes Marriage (Completed & Editing)

Big Comfy Couch

Prologue

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. I am pretty sure once the room is so quiet we can hear a watch ticking, that we have officially reached a new level of awkward.

"So, how long have you two been married?"

Oh, so the marriage counselor knows nothing about us. That is comforting. At least he stopped crinkling his eyebrows. That poor man is going to have so many wrinkles if he doesn't stop soon.

"Let's see, March made three years." And here comes Jake, always the personable one. And me, well let's just say I miss the sound of his watch. It wasn't condemning or trying to "fix" me.

"And how long did you two date before the wedding?" That is a good question let's see, our first date was the day the Patriots played the Texans. That was in January because it was playoff time...

"Hmm, our first date was two months before the wedding." Ugh he is the only may on the planet who would know the answer to that question. Mr. Perfect strikes again. I swear that man wrote the manual on how to be the perfect husband. Don't get me wrong, it is great until you realize that you are not the perfect wife.

"Now, Mrs. Lyons, you have been awfully quite. Maybe you can enlighten me on the reason for you two seeking marriage counseling."

"First of all, call me Mel," I was now severely irritated. Is this man a complete idiot? Why do people go to marriage counseling? To fix marriages. Did he think we had a problem with our plumbing? "Enlighten you? Seriously? Jake decided we needed counseling because I don't love him. I never have, and I never will.  Since we don't see even the most basic things eye to eye and so we fight, a lot.Doc, as long as we are being "open" I think you should know that neither of us plan on getting a divorce either."

Well now that the look on his face is picture worthy, I look over at Jake who now has his jaw clenched and his normally tan skin has started to turn more and more red with each passing second. The last couple months have been rough. Five different marriage counselors told us to get a divorce. Of course, that is the one thing we can't do. We both signed that contract so we are stuck together, like it or not.

"Well I can see where Jake is coming from. I don't think anyone would want to be in that kind of marriage Mel." Now I am suddenly a no one. If he is supposed to be making me feel better, he needs to find a new job.

"No, Doc, you don't understand. He agreed to it the day he proposed to me." I rolled my eyes with enough extra emphasis, that was sure to make the man cringe inside. If you want to play chess, you picked the wrong girl to do it with. I always win, perks of being a lawyer. A small smirk crossed my lips as I continue. "He said he loved me, I told him I don't believe in love. He said that it's okay because he loved me enough to deal with that. Jake you could add to this story anytime now..." Frankly, I hate explaining myself to people. Why am I at therapy again? Oh yes, trying to keep the husband happy. Note to self: in the next life time, don't get married. It is way too complicated.

"Sorry, um yea, she is right that was our agreement though I always hoped she would end up loving me and now I'm starting to lose hope that it will happ-"

"See I told you ithis would happen! This is why I said to stay away from me in the first place. Love does not exist except to tear people apart. And I don't want to loose you." It happens so quickly. Why won't people just accept the fact that they should never say that damned word in the first place. It is the worst four letter word that a person can say.

"Mel, I still love you. It is just I don't think you will feel the same way about me." Slouching slightly, I laid by head against the back of the oversized, grown-up version of the Big Comfy Couch. He knew this going in, but I feel like we have this same discussion over and over.

"Okay, you two are definitely a unique couple so we may have to do this a little differently. Please start at the beginning of your story. When was the first time you met? Mel you will go first, then Jake you will give your perspective. From there we can look at it objectively and we will move on from there okay?" Now, this sounds interesting. We haven't had a counselor do this before. I like to give my side, obviously because it is the right side. And Jake can give his own little view. It will be like a little battle of sexes game. Good, because I love games.

"Fine. There isn't much to tell though. Okay the first time I saw Jake..."