As we step out of the tour bus and into the sea of screaming teenage girl. Some with pink skirts and bows in their hair. Others in spiked combat boots and leather jacket. I loved the diversity, not one was like the other but somehow they all fit into one family. Just like any other family we had our fair share of drama and heartbreak. Even at our worst I wouldn't trade it for anything else, the fans saved us and we saved them.
I put on my best fake smile hoping they don't notice, that they won't ask, they won't feel bad. I want them to be happy, I know a handful that have been with the band since the beginning will see past my silly faces. They'll try to contact me on social media, some might even question me here. I'll explain the situation in time, right now I can barely breathe just thinking about it.
Even if a fan notices my sour looks maybe they'll excuse by saying we had a tough night. After the incident in the bus everyone is a little sour...
"Come on guys, you spilled my breakfast all over me! Do you not pay attention to anything" God I really hate this band sometimes. They are always messing around, not being careful, reckless-
Crap! I sound like our uptight manager, he's always yelling at us for the things we do and say. That people won't like us if we do this and we say that. Who cares if people don't like us, we're re being us doing what we do best, play music, be kids, make mistakes. That's just who we are and we aren't going to change for anyone, that's not the message we want for our fans. They need someone to be real for them in this screwed up world.
Great now I'm a philosopher.
"Don't be such a crab Mikey. What happen, you're girlfriend break up with you?" the brown headed kiwi, Calum jokes. Jokes. He thinks that's a joke, even on a good day that would that would bug me. How dare he.
"Calum, dude that's low. It's just the morning, right Mikey" there's Ashton as always, trying to keep the peace, taking the tension from a ten back down to at least a five. I will never understand his ability to do this, maybe it's from growing up to fast. See Ashton's dad left him when he was two. He's had to take care of his younger siblings and be the father figure for them.
"What? It's not like Abbie actually broke up with him. Besides you know I was just messing with you mate." Calum laughs at the idea of my unfortunate reality. As I imagine hitting him with a chair He finally stops laughing. A stupid move on his part, he looked at me to help verify his response.
"Talk about her again and I'll snap you're arm," this side of me isn't something I'm proud of but his comments hit below the belt "mate."
Calum is a lot like Luke on the sense that he won't let what's hurting him show. I think all of us are like that, until a certain point. Calum is not as fragile as Luke though, critics don't get to him. As I spoke my threat I saw the broken look for a second, one second too long before a goofy grin appeared in its place. That's twice today, someone is going to say something, most likely Ashton. I sit and wait for someone anyone to question me.
No one does...
Even now I wait for someone to correct my behavior. Though the more I think about it the more I believe no one ever will. That's one thing that might just rip this band apart, our lack of communication. Yeah we talk about stupid stuff, smelly shoes, taking too long of showers, but never anything that really gets to us. We're teenage boys, it's normal but when you around these people twenty four seven, tension could be suffocating.
It's like I'm on auto pilot as the boys and I swim through the sea of fans. Smiling, hugging, laughing and taking pictures. Luckily it goes by fairly quick. Soon we're in the radio station ready to answer questions, play music and take some fan calls.
I feel a slight buzz come from my phone in my pocket. We're just about to start so I choose not to look at it just yet. It's probably nothing important and if it is I'll feel the buzz again.
The radio show goes well enough. We played a few songs, mainly the most popular ones. The fans sent in questions from Twitter that make me smile, only a little but it's enough to make my day that much brighter. When it comes to the phone calls everyone seems happier, it's always the fans that make the worst days not so bad anymore. The first phone call though takes the mood spiraling back down.
"Hey Mikey. Why'd you break up with Abigail? I mean you two were so good for each other. "
The whole room goes silent and I'm pretty sure time stopped. I vaguely hear Calum curse under his breath, he now understanding my harsh words. How did she know, who told, what is going on.....
