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Horoscopes: a summary

Aries: asshole.

Taurus: hungry all the time.

Gemini: MONEYMONEYMONEY.

Cancer: total pissbaby.

Leo: very extroverted.

Virgo: shy af.

Libra: surprisingly good with computers.

Scorpio: angry, very angry.

Sagittarius: superiority complex.

Capricorn: thou art a dick.

Aquarius: the only actual nice one.

Pisces: will through a chair if you insult them.

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