Remember Me. (Color Me book four)

Chapter 41

Harry

I watched the steam roll off of the soup I just made, blowing on it slightly. Carli was up in our room, she hasn't left since we came home. She wouldn't look at anything, her hands never letting go of my arm. She was a mess, and Adeline wasn't leaving her anytime soon. I poured the hot liquid into two bowls, making sure Carli had enough in hers. I grabbed her medicine and counted her dose out, putting the bottle back on the window seal.

I groaned when the doorbell rang, hearing Carli walk down the stairs. "Don't answer that.." I heard her whine. I looked back at her, watching her face twisting in fear. I pursed my lips and walked over to her, placing my hands on her cheeks. I kissed her nose and walked to the door, opening it slowly.

"Sorry, is it a bad time?" Niall asked, looking at Carli as she dropped to the floor, hiding underneath the kitchen table.

"You're good, come on in." I said as I walked back to the kitchen. I had to admit that Carli was being adorable, but I hated how scared she is. Of me, of everything surrounding her. Niall followed me in, watching me as I bent down, making eye level with Carli. "Whatcha doing?" I softly asked her, making sure my tone wasn't harsh.

"Y-You opened the door." She pointed out, her eyes wide.

"It's just Niall, baby."

"Niall?" She asked, slowly poking her head from out from under the table.

"Hey." Niall smiled at her, waiving slightly. She slowly crawled out, making sure her grip was tight on me as I helped her up. "How are you doing?"

"I-"

"To be expected." I finished for her, running my hand softly across her back.

"I brought some movie snacks." Niall said, holding up a paper sack. I smiled and nodded, pointing to the counter. I looked down at Carli. "I invited him to watch some movies with us."

Carli tried to smile, but it came more like a frown. I pushed some of the hair out of her eyes, kissing her forehead. I helped get everything set up, putting in some kind of Irish scary movie Niall is currently raving about. During the film, I could sense Carli was beyond uncomfortable. Every time something jumped out, she would shrink into her seat. I tried to calm her down, but she wasn't paying attention to me. I finally had to shut it off, Niall yelling at me to go to hell.

"Niall, go home." I said, making Niall chuckle.

"I'll just finish this by myself!" Niall yelled as he left the house. I turned to look at Carli, but frowned when she was no where to be seen. I looked around the room, slowly moving through out the downstairs. Finally going upstairs, I saw Carli laying in the midst of our blankets. Her body was curled into a ball and Adeline was laying beside her. I could tell that Adeline was asleep, so I walked over to the bed and gently picked her up. Carrying her to her nursery, I kissed her head softly as I put her in her crib. Walking back to Carli, I laid beside her and pulled her into my side. She curled into me and let out a small breath.

"Can I ask you something?" Carli asked me.

"Of course." I replied.

"What are you afraid of?"

"What am I afraid of?" I repeated. I thought of an answer for a moment, I'm not scared of anything. Okay, maybe a few things. But should I tell her what I'm afraid of or should I lie? I'll go with the first one. "I'm afraid of losing you."

"Of what?" Carli looked up at me, shocked by what I just said.

"Losing you. If I said I love you, it would be an understatement. I love you more than anything else, even my own life. You're my world and if I lost you, hell, I would die soon after by a broken heart."

Carli was silent as she looked up at me, her eyes filling up with tears I knew she didn't want. I cupped her face with my hands, wiping her tears away with my thumb. "Don't cry." I whispered, kissing her cheeks as I held her.

"I- I just-" She blubbered.

"You just what?"

"How hard I try, I cant get the image out of my head. Of course its of the attack, but its also of you leaving me when I begged you not to. When.. When everything happened I kept replaying you leaving. I was imagining you came to your senses and walked back in, stopping her before anything happened. But in reality you didn't come back, you didn't save me. Is it true that you found me?"

Uh oh.

I was a fool and extremely tired when I told her that white lie. It made me feel slightly better to tell her I found her, knowing that the truth would hurt her more. Of course she knew that I was lying, she always does.

"Carli--"

"Oh no.." She breathed, slowly sitting up. I followed her actions and reached out to touch her, but she recoiled and shook her head.

Carli

I knew it was all a lie, by the way he was acting my fears were confirmed. Niall told me everything, but I was just waiting for Harry to tell me, and when he never did I wanted to kick and scream. I wouldn't be so upset if he told the truth for once.

"You lied to me." I managed to push out. Was I surprised? I could say I was, but I'm not. I feel like everything he says is a lie. If he says he's going out to work, was he really doing that? He tells me that he's happy, is he just saying that to make me happy? Because it isn't working, the fact is I'm not even close to happy.

"I-" Harry stopped talking, pain evident in his features. I shook my head again and got out of the bed.

"Why is it so hard for you to tell the damn truth?" I asked, my voice slowly raising. "You make everything worse by you lying. Tell me."

"Tell you what?" Harry said, his voice raising with mine. "Tell you that I feel like I failed you? That I blame myself for everything that has happened to you?"

"I want you to tell me the truth." I hissed.

"I am." Harry snapped.

"Seriously?" I laughed, not wanting to see his face. "You're seriously pathetic. I know you're lying, I know it. So stop whatever you're trying to accomplish and act like a decent human being."

He was silent.

"Oh wait, you cant act like it because you're such an ass." I said, walking out of the room.

Sorry for not updating for the longest time, I had stuff going on. Sooo...... I saw pictures of Harry and Kendall? I honestly don't know how to feel, I don't like her at all. But as every girl says, if he's happy I'm happy. But in reality, I'm not happy. I know I have no chance but come on, Kendall??