ASLEEP YET AWAKE

I knew you would stay

I woke up in the morning with the sun shining brightly on my face. Well it will be a lie to say that I slept at all at night because I didn't. I wept in my pillow the whole night. All the tears that did not come during the day rushed out of my eyes at night. It was only during the early morning hours that I began feeling irritated by the light of the day that I tried shutting it off. I turned and tossed in the bed trying to avoid the light of the sun. I felt strangely annoyed by it's brightness and gradually sleep overtook me.

I turned in bed. Before opening my eyes I raised a hand to shield my face from the bright light. I slowly opened my eyes. My gaze squinting in the bright sunlight. My eyes caught something metal and silver on my hand glinting in the bright light. The hollow feeling in my stomach returned as I realized what it is. Even though the bright light was a pain to look at but I still kept gazing at the silver chain on my wrist.

It was the same bracelet that Mia hooked to my wrist and unknowingly to my heart too. My heart ached for her. She may be gone but the memories we created together will always be with me to remind me of how fortunate I am that I got a friend like her. The bracelet is one of her last memories and I would treasure it over and above everything I own. It was the promise of a friendship that I Swear to behold. She is not gone she is with me forever.

I looked at the glinting chain on my hand and thought about the irony of the situation. She gave me the bracelet as a promise of friendship on the day she left me for another world. But she did not go bare handed for she had the twin of this bracelet hooked on her wrist by me. And I swear to hold my promise to her.

I got up from the bed memories clouding my mind. I walked to the window and closed it drawing the curtains. After closing all the windows the room was dark but bright enough for me to see clearly. I stood in the middle of the room unsure of what to do. My gaze fell upon the tray of food lying on the bedside table. Mom must have kept it there while I slept. I did not feel hungry even though I haven't eaten anything from yesterday.

Suddenly a thought flashed in my mind and I knew what I had to do. I walked to the dressing table and opened a drawer. I fumbled through the contents of the drawer untill I finally found what I was looking for. I took out the small ceramic jewellery box and emptied all its contents in the drawer.

I walked to the edge of the bed and placed it on the bed. I sat on the floor near the bed. I looked at the box for a while and then I opened it. I gently unhooked the bracelet from my wrist and placed it inside the little box. It was going to be something I will treasure forever. I took the little box in my hand admiring the silver chain with a heart. After it I closed the little box.

I walked to my wardrobe and opened it. I placed the little box on the top shelf where I already had something valuable. Just as I placed it inside I quickly closed my wardrobe. I did not want to see the dress again. It will bring back more memories. The pain in my heart was already intense. I doubted I would be able to take more. My heart might burst if it is subjected to more pain. Life was becoming more and more painfull with each passing moment.

I felt a lump grow in my throat. I walked to my bed and sat down. My gaze again fell on the tray of food. I climbed in bed and placed the tray on my lap. It was nothing special just a sandwich with a glass of orange juice. I ate the sandwich and drank the full glass of juice. Placing the tray again on the bedside table I again climbed in the bed.

I yearned for the night to fell. The light made me uncomfortable while the night provided a strange sense of comfort and belonging. During the day nothing could hide and everything was clearly visible while the night hid secrets and misery. It was the time when the sad weeped in their pillows while the happy rejoiced about their life. It was the time when mind stayed calm and assessed the feelings. Night was for passion. Night was for the passionate.

I wanted night to fell soon. I felt scared to face the day. I cocconed myself in the blankets and closed my eyes. I did not want to feel this pain but this feeling of emptiness seem to reside itself in me permanently.

While my eyes were closed I thought about mia and ray. I thought about meeting them again. I thought about mia and her craziness. I thought about the car accident and slowly my memories lulled me to sleep. I slept through the day and drifted into the dreams. Dreams of hapiness.

I felt cool breeze blowing. The sun had set. Only the last of its rays were casting a dull glow in the sky. I turned around to find mia sitting next to a tree. I rushed to her overjoyed at her mere sight.

"Mia... Mia.. I can't believe it's you. I thought I would never see you again. " I told her.

She turned to face me. "Why would you think something like that ? It's cruel you know". She pouted at me.

I ran over and hugged her tightly. It felt so good to feel her again.
"But you died in the car accident". I informed her. Something crossed her face. She looked sad. "I mean everyone told me that you were gone forever". I tried to clear my point.

"Yes. I know. They were right". She replied to me.

"How could they be ? When you are standing here in front of me". I demanded.

"Lara it is a dream". She smiled at me.

Her words sliced through me. I knew it was a dream. But i seem to momentarily forget the fact that it was not real. How I wished it was not a dream.

She seem to sense my pain. She grabbed my hand and told me,"don't worry. I am here with you. You can meet me in your dreams any time you want. You just need to call me".

My hopes lifted at once.

"I see you are not wearing the bracelet I gave you". She looked at me questioningly.

"Oh that i just removed to keep it safe. I will treasure it for the rest of my life. Afterall it was the last thing you gave me". I told her.

She giggled. "Where have you kept it but ?"

"I have placed it with some other thing which is equally important. You remember the dress ray gifted me ?" I did not wait for her to answer because I knew she remembered. Her expression told me so."I have kept it with the dress". I told her in a whisper.

"So I thought".she smiled at me.
"Can you stay with me for a little longer. I feel lonely here". She requested.

"Sure. I can stay as long as you want". I told her as I settled under the tree next to her.

Finally I was with my best friend again. I felt happy and content being there.