Confusion and Illusions

Sweet Nightmares and Terrifying Dreams

You're right. I don't know what I'm doing. I had spent the past 2 weeks ignoring Joshua. But my dreams had been getting more and more vivid. Especially the most current one regarding Joshua.

"Hey I'm in Texas." I texted my friend  Paul.

"Where are you?" 

"I don't know, some accounting place."

"The Grandmen's one?"

"Yeah, how'd you know?"

"I'll be there in 10 minutes, I'm bringing my gitar." Ew, who spelled guitar like that. Typo maybe? Anyways this dream got even weirder, my father was with me for some reason in this dream. And in order to see Paul, I needed to stall him.

"Dad, I need to pee."

"That's bullshit, we need to leave now." A pretty accurate depiction of him.

"Dad, seriously I'm gonna piss my pants if you don't let me go." 

"Fine, but hurry up." I ran into the building just as Paul was pulling up, his hair was as long as it was when he was in high school, and he was in blue Rip curl board shorts with a cowboy hat on. Damn Texas sure did him wonders. I didn't know he knew how to play guitar, actually I'm sure he can't play any instrument in reality. 

My dream ended. I woke up. Twenty minutes passed and I found myself falling asleep again.

I arrived at my school, for some reason with Paul, which was weird since he graduated from his high school about three years ago.  Paul was standing next to me, at my locker number 661 across from my first class. We were talking about something, that conversation I don't remember, but Joshua had walked up to us. Oh yeah, I started calling him Joshua now, I felt like it was less friendly. But, I didn't notice he was at my locker until I closed it, tunred around and accidentally ran into his chest, a place I was too familiar with.

"Hey."

"Oh, hi." I didn't bother mentioning his name, my smile faded and Paul stood there waiting for him to say something.

"So, the school dance is coming up."

"Yeah, I know."

"Well I was wondering, do you want to go with me?"

"Are you serious?" I was convinced he was just fucking around.

"Yeah of course I am."

I woke up again, this time two tear drops traveled down my cheek, I touched my face. I was crying, only because I knew something like that would never happen. I stayed up the rest of the night. Alone, again, in silence.