Summary: After a long day of school and then work, Camila still finds it impossible to sleep, no matter how tired she was. Lauren helps.
Converted from here all credits to the original author
The weight of exhaustion made Camila stagger into the apartment that her roommate once owned. Shared with her ex-girlfriend, it was like the beginning of term all over again. Except, at least this time, the space wasn't as cramped as their dorm room and Camila was more aware of her ex-girlfriend's presence than she was all those months ago. Aware of the mess she left all over the room. Clumps of her hair, balled up like a cat's, made its way to Camila's side of the apartment. Tumblers with the bottoms crusted with old coffee littered the floor. It was disgusting. Camila was at her wit's end.
Still, she took a shaky breath to focus on the task at hand. Reports to read regarding the board budgets, charters, all the boring things that came with research made her vision blurry. Camila reached for her mug but it was empty.
The view outside the window was of an old California city. The picturesque buildings and its gothic spires looked less threatening at night. With the moon hidden behind clouds and the towers, it cloaked the quad in inky darkness, hiding the cratered earth and the pissed off angler fish-god. Camila closed her fist, rested her chin against it, and renewed her promise to herself. This was a beautiful school, demonic staff and evil governing body aside. Camila chose it for a reason, and she would protect no matter the cost.
A yawn tore through her mouth and she dropped her forehead against her desk. Words danced in her vision. She murmured memorized lines of corporate by-laws. That's when she realized that it was truly time for bed.
She rose to her feet, stretched her back, and padded into the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face. Passing by the partition of the rooms, Lauren's side looked trashed as always, and empty. She was partying it up with Dinah again, no doubt. The thought wrinkled Camila's nose. She turned her back towards that side of the apartment and entered the bedroom.
The memories of their first few weeks locked in the bedroom never failed to infiltrate Camila's mind, no matter how hard she tried to block it all out. There was no use reminiscing. After all, their breakup was for the best. There was a school to protect, a student body to save, and if Lauren didn't want to help her, then... Camila would do it all herself with a lot of help from her friends.
Camila changed into a baggy sleep shirt and curled under the silk covers. She closed her eyes, willed for sleep to come. It should come; her limbs were sore, she had a tension in her neck, and her eyelids were heavy. Yet sleep eluded her.
"Argh!" Camila tossed and turned. Buried her face in the sweet-smelling pillowcase. Squeezed her eyes shut and counted sheep jumping over a white picket fence. Nothing worked.
Camila engrossed herself in her desire to sleep that she didn't hear the soft footsteps, the heavy apartment door opening and closing. With her eyes closed, Camila didn't see the crack of light, the curtain to the bedroom parting for two seconds before closing again.
"You're still up," Lauren's voice was soft and warm and tinged with the sweetbitter flashback of her breath against Camila's ear. The brown eyed girl burrowed into a pillow and ignored the echoes of missing Lauren ringing inside her chest. Her breathing was shallow and she cleared her throat to hide it.
"Really," Camila deadpanned. "I didn't think I was so transparent. Go away."
No sound of receding footsteps. Camila lifted her head from the pillow cave she made and there was Lauren, standing by the foot of her bed. She looked at her. Those eyes she once stared into, filled with love and affection and warmth, met hers. In those depths, Camila remembered what it was like to lose herself in Lauren.
Without saying another word, Lauren kicked off her leather boots and shrugged off her jacket. She crawled into bed beside Camila.
"What are you doing?" Camila demanded.
"Helping you go to sleep," Lauren sounded weary. Her arm draped over Camila's hip, she pulled her closer and buried her face against the curve of Camila's neck. "This always helped you before."
Camila lied there, frozen. There was no denying that Lauren holding her always lulled her to sleep, but this should be awkward, having your ex hold you just because she wanted you to fall asleep easily. Already, Camila's body eased. Tension left her body like she was ice and Lauren was a warm hand. Lauren's soft body against her back, the steady tickle of her breath against the nape of Camila's neck made her relax and dissolve further into Lauren's embrace.
"I know I'm not the hero you want me to be," Camila, out of habit, stroked the length of Lauren's arm while the green eyed girl spoke. Their fingers laced together. "Because that's just isn't me. And Taylor's my sister who I love. Maybe I love you in a way that only I can understand," Lauren's voice caught in her throat and Camila had to bite her lip and focus on evening out her breathing. "But I love you nonetheless."
In Lauren's arms, Camila trembled. She turned around, faced Lauren with her eyes shining from the glow of the streetlamps right outside the window. It was easier to ignore the loneliness inside her chest when it's daylight when there were things to do. But when it was silent, the longing would creep in and sting Camila's eyes into submission.
Lauren swept back a lock of Camila's hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead. "I don't want to sleep," Camila murmured. She grasped the fabric of Lauren's shirt and wriggled closer. "And it's not because I can't. It's just..." The older girl's arms tightened around Camila, her nails dragging against the base of her spine. "I don't want to."
I want to be aware of this, of you holding me. Camila thought, her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth, preventing her from saying those things out loud. I want to remember what was impossible to forget.
A smile curled Lauren's blood red mouth. "That's okay."
They cuddled for a long time. Camila stared at the column of pale white skin, the way it flexed whenever Lauren swallowed. Her hands, cold against the warm skin of Camila's back, traced circles along her spine. She didn't realize she was shivering until Lauren pulled her closer and kissed the corner of her mouth.
This was simply too much. To be close yet not at all. Grasping the front of Lauren's shirt, Camila kissed her.
"You're tired. You need to sleep." Lauren murmured, a furrow in her brow. She kissed Camila back, the human girl's hand curled against the back of Lauren's neck. She pressed her face against Lauren's cheek. Her heart thundered inside her chest so loud that Lauren rested the heel of her palm against it, closed her eyes, and listened.
Lauren may be right, but to sleep was only the fifth on her list of important things to do. The top priority was to keep the restriction in her chest from squeezing her too tight. To prevent this longing from engulfing her. Kissing Lauren helped. It reminded her of sweeter times and it kept her afloat. With every intake of breath reminded Camila of better times, and that's where she wanted to stay.
It was irresponsible to close her eyes and forget all the bad things that broke them up, but Camila took a moment to be selfish with Lauren. She kissed her again and again. Taking her in like air in her needy lungs. Air that Lauren readily offered. So selfless, Camila thought, and Lauren doesn't even know it.
Their lips clung together and Camila tilted her head back to suck in cooler air and not the tepid breaths they've been sharing for the past ten minutes. Her body boiled from within, the covers in a crumpled mess by their interlocked legs.
"I know one sure way to get you to sleep," Lauren whispered against the curve of Camila's jaw.
"I can't sleep now. I have to be awake for... this." Camila's arms snaked around Lauren. Her flushed face hidden against the crook of the older girl's smooth neck.
"Come on, don't you still have to save the world tomorrow?" Lauren teased and the pad of her thumb smoothed out the crease on Camila's brow. Fingers stroked her cheek, cupped her face, and tilted her chin. Lauren's kiss was light, fleeting. Made Camila's toes curl out of longing. "We might not be together anymore, but I'm still here for you."
That was how Camila ended up as the small spoon once again, with Lauren's face pressed up against the nape of her neck, kissing all the spots that made her tremble. A lick to the spot behind her ear. A hand that roamed the flat plane of Camila's stomach. Camila gripped Lauren's arm not to pull her away but to guide her. Her hand covered the back of Lauren's and steered her to the heat source of her body, the rising warmth between her legs.
A low hum rumbled against Camila's back, stemming from Lauren's chest. She pushed her hand into Camila's panties and her fingers dragged through the slick heat. Camila's arms curled around the back of Lauren's head, her face turned toward hers in an eager kiss. The tips of Camila's digits caught against Lauren's thick hair. Her grip tightened, and Lauren grinned. Bared her teeth, sharp and luminous and glinted with streetlight.
Camila's throat flexed, her pulse thrumming while Lauren touched her. Her fingers slippery with Camila's cum, Lauren nibbled on the curve of Camila's ear. Stroked her stiff clit in lazy circles, while Camila clung to her. Thighs trembled against Lauren's wrist, keeping her trapped. Camila bucked into her hand, panting in short, ragged breaths.
Lauren's lips trailed along her fluttering pulse. Kissed it, teeth raked against the sensitive skin. Camila's face, flushed and sweating, burnt a bright red.
"I'm coming," Lauren swallowed the soft whimpers Camila made. She stroked her clit faster. Camila's body curved, arching into Lauren's deft hand. "Oh, Lo..."
"Camila, Camila, Camila..." Lauren murmured against the line of the girl's jaw. She took her bottom lip into her mouth and nibbled on it while Camila reached the crest of her orgasm. Her thighs shook, her drenched folds slicking up Lauren's still stroking fingers.
Lauren eased her hand out of Camila's panties and kissed her cheek, while the girl's eyelids fluttered to a close. Her breasts rose and fell. Lauren rubbed her cheek against Camila's and rubbed her belly.
It was like floating in clouds, being held by Lauren post-orgasm. Subtle tremors wracked Camila's body. She remained breathless, in the cusp of dreaming and being aware of Lauren's presence. The familiar way in which she held her. As if she was the most precious thing on earth.
The green eyed girl shifted and Camila tensed. She clung to Lauren's arm. "D-don't go." Camila looked at Lauren whose green eyes seemed to absorb all the light. But where does all that light end up? Nowhere to go but inside her.
"I'll stay until you fall asleep."
Camila fought her heavy eyelids if only to stay like this longer. Like there was nothing wrong with the world. Like the school is safe. Like she and Lauren were together again.
But as with all good things, they end in the morning. Sunlight filtered through silk curtains. Camila woke up to an empty bed. The floor was cold beneath her bare feet. She stumbled her way to the bathroom only to pause and saw Lauren's body, supine over the fainting couch. Of course, she was still asleep. Camila wound her way, stepped over plastic solo cups and other party debris until she stood by the couch where Lauren slept.
"Thank you," Camila whispered, her lips lingering against Lauren's forehead.
Lauren's eyes cracked open. Her half-smile was beautiful in the morning light. She made a noncommittal sound and a single shoulder shrug. "It was nothing."
But to Camila, it was everything, and even then, beyond that.
