There's a Thin Line Between Hate and Love (JeanxEren)

Scene XXII

Nope. Absolutely not.

Just because he fits the "criteria" my mom said doesn't mean that I should...date him. He doesn't...well, he's straight anyway.

Jean is looking at me expectantly as if I'm going to tell him who it is I thought of. No way in hell. He'll tease me. So much.

"Don't look at me like a sad puppy, you horse."

"I'm not sad, I'm just waiting," he says, hope in his voice.

"No. Why do you care anyway?"

He glares at me.

"Why the fuck else would I care other than-"

He stops and sighs, looking at me. What? I know for a fact there's nothing on my face.

"What?!" I groan.

"Nothing. You're just an idiot. And as oblivious as they get."

Oblivious as they get? Seriously? Does he have any idea how much people watching I do? I think I'm pretty damn observant.

"...Hey, Jean?" I inquire.

"Yeah?"

"Why'd you kiss me?"

I don't even know why I'm asking. I don't care why. I shouldn't even think about what he does to me. He wants me to act as 'me', rather than immersing myself in the character. He might've been just trying to catch me off guard. There's a hundred ways I could rationalize this, but I'm asking anyway.

God knows why.

"I just felt like it."

"Huh?" That's it? He just...did it?

What. the. hell. That's completely unfair. You can't just kiss somebody and then tell them something sappy and say it was because you 'felt like it'.

"There was absolutely no reason?" I press.

"Well yeah, I mean, I guess I...got caught up in the moment and," he looks to the side as he says this. "...I mean, kissing you when we're acting isn't...you know, unpleasant, so...sometimes I just want to."

'Not unpleasant'. I can't tell if that's a compliment or not, considering my assumption was that he hated it.

"Wait, so you wanted to kiss me?" I ask.

That's completely different.

"Well yeah, but not for...any particular reason..."

"Oh," I respond.

I'm trying to read his eyes, but I can't because of their unusual color. How in the world could I have let someone like this come to know nearly everything about me? He's a jerk, and he insults me for no reason, and I really don't know much about him.

Suddenly I find it unfair. This punk knows basically all the things I'm most self-conscious about, and I don't know a thing.

I'm supposed to be the one who keeps to myself, and yet I'm the one who's spilled my life story to him.

"Jean? Who's Annie?"

His eyes turn back to me. He looks a little surprised.

"Annie is my best friend. I've known since...well almost as long as I've known you, and Mikasa," he says. "Why?"

"I just realized I don't know anything about you. I can't have my weaknesses all out in the open when I know nothing of yours," I tell him. I'm not sure if my tone sounded pouty or defensive.