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**Lydia**

I knew I was dreaming, but it didn't make things any better. A familiar pair of eyes hovered over me, watching every step I took, waiting for me to slip up. And the steps I took were precarious. There was nothing but thick, oozing darkness around me, and I could barely see my feet as I set them down carefully on slippery stepping stones. Somewhere to my side, I knew Anna was with me, but she was just sort of there. I reached out to take her hand, in a plea for some kind of support, but grasped at empty air.

The eyes never left me, even as I groped for my friend in the darkness. I gave up reaching, settling for Anna's presence, and continued forward, hoping wakefulness was ahead. The eyes wouldn't let me hold still. I had to keep going, keep pushing into the blackness to get away from them. I had to hurry, but I had to be careful. I was concentrating on my footing when I became aware of a light ahead, and the eyes darted in front of me, narrowing as they stared at the figure in the light.

Theo was ahead. His back was to me, and there was somebody in his arms. They swayed slowly, and then the other person fell. I tried to rush forward as Theo knelt and covered their body with his own. The eyes went wide and flashed back to me, filled with a fire I'd never seen in them, despite having gazed into them for hours in the not so distant past. They left me again, intent on Theo and the crumpled form on the ground. The stones beneath my feet trembled, and I called out to Theo, to Anna, to anyone. The darkness crept over me, and the ground fell away from under Theo, tumbling him and whoever he was protecting into the emptiness.

Anna appeared in front of me, a calm look on her face. I tried to reach for her, but my arms felt pinned to my sides. She reached out and wiped tears I hadn't realized I'd been crying from my cheeks. Then the blackness took her too, and I was alone, paralyzed, and not even the eyes were visible anymore. I am not afraid of much. I have no reason to be. But in that dream, begging my brain to wake up, I was terrified.

****

I had definitely woken up on the wrong side of the bed after that, and I was made saltier by the shower going cold halfway through washing my hair and thinking about the one figure in my dream I couldn't immediately identify. My mood hadn't been improved by the discovery of Amara's necklace between the cushions of my sofa when I had sat down grumpily to watch the morning news. That had sent me off on a whirlwind search of my entire condo, and resulted in a small box of her things staring at me from my kitchen counter.

Just little things, but each one was a jab in the gut. Dull and not very powerful after a month, but still enough to make me angry. I needed a distraction, but it was Sunday. I didn't have to work (yes, I work, I've mentioned this before. It's mainly just to keep me busy), and I'd done all my errands the day before. Anna hadn't answered her phone or texts, which meant she was absorbed in some book, or out being charitable, and Theo liked to sleep late (especially after what I suspected had been another "oh my god, so amazing" night with Daniel), which meant waiting a little while before I could actually expect a response to the text I'd sent him – "Plans for this evening? If not, I have oolong, I just made a run to the bank, and I need to hear about your Daniel."

The two of them had been out together with increasing frequency, and I still hadn't met the amazing one. Theo was impulsive, and in constant motion (or so it felt sometimes), so maybe he was just waiting for the bottom to fall out of his newfound...relationship? I didn't even know what to call it. That would explain the lack of introduction.

Then again, what if his constant motion had ceased? That would scare the shit out of him, and could account for keeping Anna and I at a safe distance from Daniel as well. He wasn't like me. I had introduced him and Anna to Amara, and many of my past loves, almost immediately. But I wasn't going to think about any of that. Nothing good had ever come of any of that. Maybe Theo was the smart one.

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