My Rants, Opinions, Letters, And Theories

yesterday sucked ass {my first <and probably not last> crisis}

today's the day before my birthday! (totally not the point wtf brain)

so (yesterday?! holy fuck it's 5am. i woke up at 6 yesterday. i have not slept in almost 24 hours...I'm sure it's fine) yesterday i was feeling meh like all day. just meh. no happiness or sadness or anything really. just. meh. (ishouldprobablygoseeatherapistshouldn'tilolmovingon) and i just realized it was because i couldn't stop thinking about how much better fictional worlds are.

(i mean, could i survive in one? never. I'd die faster than you can say "where is gradeafangirl?". but still. they're wayyyy better than fucking trump. if i think about how he actually has supporters and shit, I'll spiral into a black abyss and lose any <very fleeting> remaining hope i have for humanity, so. fuck that shit.)

anyway.

so i watched danisnotonfire's Internet support group 3 and a girl who's my age (not for much longer! whoooo! bday! *i type with a blank face*) was having the same problem! and i was all like 'so relatable! go humans!' etc., and then he was all like

"You're having an existential crisis and you're only 13?! I'm still having mine!" -Dan Howell, 200(9? idk)

and then i was all like

"...Well, shit." -Me, 2016

so yeah. that was...an experience. (today really sucked ass. seriously. but then i watched the Kraze cereal challenges on both his and Phil's channel and I laughed so. I'm back, i guess?)

{and this is so fucking weird. I'm a very happy person. i make jokes about things so they don't get to- oh. all the emotions most likely just started to build up and- oh. um...k then.}

dragging you away from my pity party now. go back to whatever it was you were doing. i hope you have a better day than i just did. (i hope i do too)

bye.