Chapter 15

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I sprint to him and get there just as he hits the ground. The sound of bullets whiz past my head but I tune them out. I kneel down beside Neil, who's fallen unconscious, and see that he got shot in the stomach. Blood is spurting out faster than I can comprehend.

I will myself not to cry at the sight. "Neil, oh my god Neil." I breathe. I don't know what to do.

Natalie rushes over, taking down the last few Mars men on her way. Someone from our side cries out in victory, "We won!" But I don't care. None of it matters. If Neil dies I don't have anyone left. His breathing is shallow, his face too pale. He looks pained, even if he's unconscious.

"What do we do?" I ask.

"We got a man down. We need help ASAP!" Natalie yells, appearing rock hard. But she brushes her hair out of her eyes, which I realize hold as many tears as mine.

Someone runs over with a stretcher and we lift Neil onto it together. He's taken back inside to the infirmary, where some doctors look over him and do their best to remove the bullet. He's alive right now, but they don't know how long he'll stay that way.

...........................

When the doctors are done with him they let us see him. I let Natalie go in first. She stays with him for about ten minutes, and I hear some sniffling, but that's about it. She walks out and I go in. I inhale sharply as I see him lying there, as white as the sheets he lays on.

"Oh Neil..." I mutter. I sit down on the edge of the bed. He's shirtless, with bandages wrapped all around his stomach. His chest rises and falls slowly; he looks peaceful, but sad. I wonder what he's dreaming about. "What would I do without you?" I whisper. I run my hand through his hair lightly, pushing it out of his face. My hand comes to a rest on the side of his face, cupping his jaw.

I sit with him for a few more minutes, then kiss him on the cheek and murmur, "I love you." I walk away quickly, before the dam holding back my tears breaks completely.

I look around the rest of the infirmary on my way out, and reach the end of the room, where they keep the dead until they're buried. They're in huge bags, with name tags to label them. The stench of death radiates from them and makes me feel sick. I notice a name on one of them.

Allon Starboard, Jupiter Rebel Leader Number 11.

The dam breaks and my tears flow. I look around cautiously and unzip the bag just a little. I wish I hadn't. He hasn't been dead long. The color hasn't even faded all the way from his cheeks. I unzip it just a little further and find out he got shot in the chest with an arrow. Straight through the heart.

He was such a good man. Honorable. Fair. I barely even knew him.

I choke back my sobs and zip the bag back up as quietly as I can.

I need some air.

...............................

That night I lie on top of the Metal Head, in the exact place I spent my first night here with Neil. The stars are just as bright as before; nebulas and suns exploding with color in the distance. I can't stop thinking.

What if Neil dies? Why did Allon have to? When will the fighting end? Are they gonna keep at it until there's nothing left but stardust?

Somehow I have a feeling that this fight was only the beginning. It was just a bud, which will soon grow to a full, interstellar war. And there's nothing I can do about it. Good people are dying on both sides; there isn't even a clear enemy anymore.

I lay awake for hours, going over the fight in my head. I killed. I killed several men and I didn't even feel bad. I mean they were terrible people, probably prisoners, so it could have been worse. But still.

That's what this war is doing. It's turning innocent people into murderers. It breaks families apart and thousands of lives were taken. What next? Will they blow up an entire planet? Would they go that far? I start to realize something. The only way this war will ever end is to destroy it all. One planet won't stop until the others are gone. There won't be any winner.

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