SDMN/Pack One-shots

Would You Rather › Minizerk (Emon/Zerkstar)

cause im bored af you're getting this.

"It's gonna have to be Ethan, init," Simon sighed.

"AYY! Emon confirmed!" Josh said happily.

Josh was probably the biggest Emon shipper of them all. He basically was the father to the ship, after all - he did create it. "Emon are such a cute couple." The words that had started it all, back in a GTA race in 2014.

However, Simon was not on board; he clearly didn't like the idea of being shipped with Ethan. "That doesn't confirm anything! Just because I'd rather get fucked by Ethan's tiny dick than by a horse doesn't mean that we love each other!"

"Ah, but it does!" Josh proclaimed, ignoring Simon's protests of "no it doesn't!"

"Friends shouldn't be willing to fuck each other! Unless you're friends with benefits, that is," Josh averted his eyes. "Therefore you two are either friends with benefits or in a relationship."

"We're neither of those things," Simon insisted. "You of all people should know that. Plus, your logic is flawed. I said I'd rather be fucked by Ethan than a horse. I don't want to die, Josh! At least after the one minute Ethan takes to finish, I can go wipe my memory or some shit."

Josh mulled it over. "Eh, fair point."

His thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a proclaim from Simon. "You know, I kinda ship you and Vik."

"What?" Josh asked in disbelief.

"Yeah!" Simon said, seeming to gain confidence as he went on. "Like y'know when you talk shit or something to him, and he just does whatever you ask. It's sorta cute, in this really weird BDSM-type way. Like you're his dad."

Josh growled. "We are nothing more than just friends, thanks."

"What would your ship name be, though? Vosh?"

"I'm sure Tumblr has come up with one already."

"True," Simon laughed.

Josh paused. "Some people ship us, did you know that?"

Simon groaned, shifting in his chair. "Well, I kinda figured. People will find reasons for anything nowadays."

"But don't you think it's a bit odd?" Josh pressed. "Like, just the whole thing?"

"I guess so. I mean, it is a little weird, because you have Freya, and I have... my hand."

"Simon, your hand does not suffice as a proper partner. What, do you talk to your hand now?"

"Whatever," Simon grumbled. "I'm cutting this part out."

---

"It could be your favorite dick," Josh suggested. Then, after realizing what he had said, he frowned.

"Mad," Simon muttered.

Josh shrugged. "Ethan's."

"Mad," Simon repeated. "We went over this before, remember? My 'favorite dick', as you call it, is mine. I have no intention of ever coming near another dude's penis."

"Sure, whatever."

---

"No, but actually, would you rather eat the pie or sit on the pie?" Simon asked Josh after they had wrapped up the recording.

Josh frowned for a moment before speaking. "I think I'd rather sit on the dick, honestly. Pie is just too good to pass up. Unless it's my least favorite pie. Then I'd rather sit on the pie."

"You'd sit on a dick?" Simon asked incredulously.

Josh shrugged. "Yeah, why not? Like I said, it's not gay if you're just sitting on it."

"But that would hurt," Simon persisted. "You really wanna do that?"

"Yeah! Pie's great."

Simon frowned. "I think people finally have a reason to call you gay now."

"I'm not gay!"

"Fine, then. Bisexual, whatever."

is it bad i have almost all the dialogue of that video memorized?

also i havent watched youtube since friday what have i missed (pls dont spoil anything. just give easter challenges [what did they do], other games they've played, etc :)

josh just uploaded a vid called the most explosive football game. who did he play this with. im concerned. oh well i guess i will find out when i get back from vacation (saturday evenin. r i p)