I'm Dying To Live (Rewriting)

Chapter 10

Just a heads up, I think I wanna put a trigger warning here.
I don't know if its anything major, but in the right state of mine it could probably affect you more than normal so just take care yeah, don't read it if you can't handle it please I don't want anyone hurt and I'll see if I can make a clean version.

So there's thoughts of self harm and the inside of Alex's sad mind again (I personally don't like to call it depression as that's an illness and I can't remember if he's actually been diagnosed or not but whatever) but there's no actual graphic self harm in there, just thoughts of it. There's also an abuse scene which isn't too graphic but its not too subtle either so if you don't wanna read that just message me I'll see what I can do.

Alex's POV

I let my eyes roam over Jack's slim frame as he took a deep breath and moved further away from me. "I really don't wanna talk about it Lex," he said softly, his fingertips tracing the duvet cover unconsciously as he stared into open space.

"Jack, please. I want you to talk about it."

He nodded and swallowed thickly. "I know you do."

"So tell me."

"Another time Lex," he muttered, smiling at me and getting up slowly from his position lying down. "But right now I need to go home."

"I'm not sure I want you to go home Jay," I replied gently, placing my hand on his shoulder.

He flinched but didn't move away, instead just shooting me an apologetic look. It was obviously going to take him some time to get used to me again, but I was ready to work for it. I could tell that he was trying, and so that was all that mattered to me.

"I'll be fine," he said, rolling his eyes at me and laughing lightly. "I'll probably be back later anyway."

"How late?" I asked, pushing myself off the bed and absentmindedly rocking on the balls of my feet.

"Dunno, but as long as that key is still under the mat then I guess it doesn't matter too much, does it?" he replied, chuckling some more. It was an empty chuckle though; there was no actual life there. As real as it sounded, it wasn't fooling me.