A/N: Greetings mellon! So after the...ahem...last one...I figured I would do something more light hearted, so here we are! Yay! Okay, I'll shut up now. Bye!
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Legolas: (Casually practicing at archery range)
Sauron: (Leaps down from ceiling and grabs his shoulders) RAWWW!!!
Legolas: (Jumps and shrieks, pointing arrow at him) AHHHHGGG! Oh, its you. (Lowers bow) What do you want?
Sauron: AM I NOT THREATINING?!?
Legolas: (Sighs) Yes yes, you are the most terrifying thing ever. Oh my valar. Ah. Now can I get back to my archery practice?
Sauron: (Evilly smiles) NO! I HAVE COME TO GIVE YOU A DARE!
Legolas: (Rubs temple) Geez! Do you have to yell everything you say?
Sauron: YES! MUAHAHAHAHA!
Legolas: (Shakes head) Fine, what is this 'dare' you speak of?
Sauron: WELL, ACTUALLY, IT IS FOR EVERYONE! MUAHAHAHAHA! HELP ME ROUND THEM UP!
Legolas: Will you stop yelling?
Sauron: Pfft, NO!
Legolas: Well then no.
Sauron: I DARE YOU TO!
Legolas: FINE! (mumbles) I'm going to need some aspirin... TAURIEL! TAURIEL! COME HERE, YOUR ASSISTANCE IS NEEDED!
Tauriel: (Runs through door) What!?
Legolas: We have to go.
Tauriel: Go where?
Legolas: Ask the yelling maniac.
Sauron: I AM NOT A YELLING MARATHON!
Legolas: I said 'maniac', not marathon!
Sauron: STILL OFFENDED! EITHER WAY, I HAVE A DARE, BUT EVERYONE MUST BE TOGETHER TO ACCOMPLISH IT! WE NEED TO ROUND THEM UP!
Tauriel: (Sigh) I'll go get Gandalf..
Gandalf: (Slides down a rainbow) Did some one call?
Sauron: YE-
Gandalf: Be silent! Keep your forked tongue behind your teeth!
Sauron: OFFENDED! I DON'T EVEN HAVE A MOUTH! (Sobs)
Tauriel: Gandalf, we need you to summon everyone here.
Gandalf: Sure thing! (Magically summons) (Everyone appears)
Sauron: Good! NOW! WE HAVE ALL BEEN DARED TO WATCH THE MOVIE, 'THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING!'
Everyone: What?
Sauron: THE FELLOWSH-
Gimli: We heard that part 'ya scum! We meant, what is this 'The Fellowship Of The Ring', and why are we watching it?
Sauron: T'WAS A DARE! (sets disc in laptop) GO!
Laptop: (music)
Pippin: (hides behind Merry) Where's it coming from?
Merry: (Rolls eyes) the laptop, fool of a Took! (sniggers)
Pippin: (Glares) Death will become of you.
Merry: (Scared) Um...what?!
Pippin: Nothing!
Gandalf: Be silent!
Merry & Pippin: Hhmph.
Laptop: (Frodo is stabbed)
Frodo: (Cringes) Ah! The memories! To painful! (Hides in Sam's arm)
Laptop: (The Council of Elrond)
Gimli: I wish I didn't smash my axe...it was a good axe...
Legolas: (Pats) I'm...sure it was...I guess... why are you mourning an axe?
Gimli: Because I can! (sniffs)
Legolas: (moves over a seat)
Laptop: (Movie ends)
Boromir: WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT DIED! WHY ME! WHY?
Frodo: Well, you did kind of try to kill me...
Boromir: Oh, right...sorry 'bout that...
Frodo: Sorry about your death...
Boromir: It's (Sobs) fine! (Sobs) ...WAHHHH!
Sauron: AND LEAVING! (runs out of room and hides under bench so he can convince more people that he's terrifying)
Gandalf: Away with you all! (Magically returns people to their homes)
Legolas: Well that was... strange.
Tauriel: I agree.
Thranduil: (Sashays in to room fabulously) What did I miss?
Legolas: Oh valar...
Tauriel: A movie.
Thranduil: Oh! A movie! Was there dancing? I love dancing! (Starts dancing terribly)
Legolas: (Groans loudly) ADA! STOP! You are so embarrassing oh my valar help me!
Thranduil: (whips hair) No, I'm fabulous!
Tauriel: Hahahahahahahahah! Oh god I feel so sorry for you!
Legolas: (Rolls eyes) Thanks I guess. Lets leave and spare our sanity.
Tauriel: Archery?
Legolas: Archery.
Thranduil: You are just jealous you will never be as fabulous as me! (sashays out of room)
Gandalf: ...Why is he king again?
YOU ARE READING
Legolas Oneshots
FanfictionLegolas Oneshots! Yeah! Most will be times readers, but some will be made up characters. I'm just going say language warning now because at some point I'm sure there will be swearing. Most of these will be fluff, but there will be some angst. Warnin...
