Insusceptible

-one--

Previously on Counterfeit:

Charleston was right beside me, struggling to find his breath, leaning against Patrick as he helped him run forwards. Everything was too much and not enough at the same time. Too much pain, not enough time. Too much smoke, not enough air.

Everything was gradually being claimed by the fire. I couldn't help but wonder where we were going from here. If there Plan was to run, then we were already doomed.

Up ahead, several hundred yards away, some people were waving frantically, as if to say 'here we are' or 'you've gotta hurry'.

They were standing by a parked van, doors open waiting for us as the distance between us decreased. We finally got closer, and I could see that it was Ava waiting for us, along with Alistair, and Blaze who was in the back.

As we reached the vehicle, Blaze extended a hand out, pulling Charleston inside the van with the help of Patrick. Once he was in, they turned for me, both lifting me from my father and escorting me inside, Ava and my dad following immediately after. There were no seats, so we huddled up on the dirty floor, feeling every bump and turn as the car sped away.

It was so dark inside, but as we passed the fire, just enough light was let in from the windows for me to be able to see my brother driving us away. I couldn't recall how long we had been apart for; almost a year, maybe, but I was unable to feel even a glimmer of happiness, despite how much I had missed them both.

I turned to where my dad was sitting on one side of me, holding me tightly to him as if he could never bare the thought of letting me go through that again.

He tried so hard to say something to me, but no words would come out. There was some guilt eating away at him for letting his daughter endure such horror, something he could never take back.

It was quiet in the van. Charleston, Patrick, my father, and I were all crying, but there was no other noise. No other hope in the world that could spare us from all the terrible things we were haunted with. Patrick was leaning his head on Ava, I was doing the same to my dad, Charleston's hand holding onto mine like I was all he had left.

There was an irremediable void growing inside each of us that night. Spreading darkness wherever light existed. That was how I realized that the real tragedy of life is having to survive it, when really we were only ever made to live it.

—one-

And I need you now tonight,
And I need you more than ever.
+ Total Eclipse of the Heart +

-

In the days that passed, there was an understanding that wouldn't part from me: how the absence doesn't go, you just learn to live around it. Well, I was still waiting.

We had been kept inside the institute for the past 18 days, no one in and no one out. Hiding, except no one wanted to call it that.

The others had started on a plan, structuring what came next for all of us, but I wanted nothing to do with creating it. I couldn't risk losing another one of my friends because I hadn't figured out a way to save them. I couldn't survive that again when I was barely pulling myself through it now.

A knock on my door interrupted me. I had been sat in front of the mirror at the end of my bunk, staring at myself trying to find something recognisable, to see if any memories would find there way back to me. I wasn't only searching for who I was before The Dormir, but who I was with MiKinley.

I had lost so much of myself I barely existed anymore...

I looked over towards where Ava was appearing. She smiled at me softly, full of putty, full of an ache to have her best friend back. I had no doubt that mine was somewhat similar.