The Diaries of Kenny McCormick

Kiss and Tell(only you)

Criss kissed me today... Sorry I just had to write that down to grasp the severity of that, let's try it again *cough* *cough* okay... CRISS FUCKING KISSED ME TODAY! I'm not happy about it... What? Why the hell are you looking at me like that you fucking book... SHUT UP. Okay, maybe it'll help if we started from the beginning after I got to school. Shall we? (why the fuck am I asking you're just a book!)

"Why are you staring at me?" Criss raised her eyebrow, with a mouthful of strawberry yogurt she responded,

"I'm not!" Then she went back to digging her spoon into her yogurt, while still looking at me through the corner of her eye... 

"Hey, Criss..." She looked up licking yogurt from her lips.

"Yeah?"

"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU STARING AT ME?" Cartman burst into laughter and kicked me while flailing in his little fit of laughter.

"HA! The bus boy's sister likes poor kid!" He yelled. Criss turned red and smashed her yogurt cup on Cartman's head, it shut him up, to say the least.

"I already told you David and me AREN'T  related JUST because we're both Mexican! And... NO, I DON'T LIKE KENNY!" Cartman glared at her but Kyle quickly sat between them.

"Leave her alone, fat ass." <--- because Kyle obviously loves that tub of lard... Just saying. As soon as Kyle started arguing with fat ass to keep him occupied (isn't it CUTE when couples argue? -.-) Criss went back to staring at me again, trying so hard to be discrete behind her sandwich and tamale.

I opened my mouth to ask her for I don't know... Maybe the 100th time, why when Stan looked at her confused.

"Why are you staring at him?" Criss flushed an adorable, no.... Uh, she turned red... Yeah, whatever I don't care MOVING ON! Criss got to her feet.

"I AM NOT!" Finally fed up I guess she grabbed her stuff and stormed off. Why do girls always storm off, can't they just cloud off...(i may or may not be a little high while writing this)... Why do they have to be so dramatic? I really don't know if she expected me to go after her, or chase her down to comfort her, but like the good guy, I am! I didn't. I stayed at the table eating my baloney sandwich and drinking my water, just thinking why Criss was acting so... Crazy. She wasn't like this yesterday.

"Eric, Kyle, Stan, Kenny: do you know where Criss went?" Our much nicer(much curvier bigger tits, nicer butt, nicer nips nicer... sorry going on a tangent) teacher Delatorre asked us as we arrived in our fifth period after lunch. We all shrugged. I guess ditching was a thing even for the craziest of nerds.

"AHAHA! She's probably still washing dishes, and busting the cafeteria tables! RIGHT DAVID!" He yelled looking back to the annoyed Mexican. I rolled my eyes and decided to focus on something more delightful, like Ms. Delatore.

 Delatore was no Garrison, I'll tell you that, besides from looking totally  HAWWWWWT(I'd fill this entire page with W's if you'd let me) she also actually TAUGHT us stuff, like who the fuck did she think she was! She was even fairly good at it her tits honestly got me to keep my head up and focused forward...  Still looking at those perfect balloons made me think of the missing crazy. I hadn't really given her my full inspection yet. Typically I did that within the first minute of seeing a girl but I hadn't done any measurements with my eyes yet, shit... I hadn't really looked at them, why the hell not? What the fuck does that mean? Did I forget? It's not anywhere in my diar- JOURNAL, it's not drawn on any of my notes... AM I GOING CRAZY? I'm always drawing girl's tits, whenever I see them... I have a complete book dedicated purely to that... Why isn't Crazy in that book? Well, it's not THAT big of a deal right? It was just a stupid slip up, I've been preoccupied with other stuff...