I'm Not Yours (Fall Out Boy // All Time Low)

Darling, You'll Be Okay

I slowly make my way over to the Panic! At The Disco bus. I really need to talk to someone. And even with how much I loved my brother and his bandmates, I knew I couldn't go to any of them.

"Hey, Brendon! Open up!" I shout as I bang on their door. There's rushing and banging before finally the door to the bus opens.

"What's up chica?" Brendon asked as he answered the door.

"I've got a problem that I can't go to Patrick with and I need some help."

"Well, what's your problem?" He invited me to sit at the dining room table as we continued talking.

"So, I'm just going to say this straight up. I like Jack." At this point I have my eyes squeezed shut, worried of what he's going to say.

"And what do you want me to do about it?" I expected something different out of him. I kind of expected him to start squealing like a middle school girl starts squealing about how her best friend just admitted who she likes even though they've both known for two months.

"I think he likes me but I don't know and I don't want to get hurt again." I've said too much now. Curse my rambling.

"What do you mean 'again'? And I know Jack likes you. I remember seeing his eyes light up when we told him you were coming on tour with us. Now tell me what you mean by 'again'." Brendon looks at me with concern about the last part of my comment.

"Can we talk over some Starbucks? I need some coffee and I don't want anyone overhearing this conversation." I start to stand up, looking at Brendon, hoping that he'll say yes.

"Yeah sure. Let me grab my wallet and you go tell Pat about us leaving."

With that, I leave for the Fall Out Boy bus to get ready to admit to someone what happened to make me drop out of college. To admit what happened to make me try and forget about the people I love most.

I was scared... Super scared. I needed Brendon to promise that he wouldn't tell Patrick. That'll be the first thing I say when we sit down to talk.

Patrick can't know until later... I think. I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to keep this a secret from my brother... I have to hope forever, but I know Pat and I know how concerned he is with me right now. He's going to keep digging until he finds something.

When I finally get to the bus, nobody is there so I write a note to everyone telling them where I'm going and who I'll be with and everything. I then go to the bunks, grab some cash out of my bag, and head back to the Panic! bus to meet up with Brendon.

As soon as Bren sees me from in front of the bus, he smiles at me.

"Shall we?" he asks as he puts his arm out for me to link with mine.

"We shall," I respond as I link my arm with his.