Safe

Some Memories are Best Left Alone

{WELP, I didn't do it the last chapter but this one really needs it so,

This chapter contains: Struggling with one's sexuality, coming out, homophobia, homophobic parents, implied death threat, mentioning of the Stonewall riots, and one homophobic slur (used twice) that I DIDN'T want to write, it made me uncomfortable but, I felt it was needed to really express emotion in one sentence, This was difficult for me to write but I needed to touch upon the situation.}

It was odd to say the least, the entire situation they were in was really not what Fiddleford expected living with Stanford again was going to be like. He thought that maybe they'd catch up and Ford would still be that sweet dork he knew from college and as months passed by Fiddleford started realizing the Ford he knew was weak, taken over by a large ego and faked stoic nature. He knew Ford usually meant well but things never go as planned with him. While, no, Fiddleford doesn't love the scientist any less than before but, there are times he wished Ford would stop trying to be what he's not. But, sometimes, Fiddleford can still see that sweet eighteen year old he saved from who knows how many simple minded thugs. Sometimes, Ford still acts like his Ford, like when he's with Tate for example, or when he realizes he screwed up. Walking down the halls of this school brought back so many memories some bad and some good but, there was one in particular that made his heart ache as it played in his mind, the day Ford told him:

~

Stanford bursted through the door of his dorm room, covering his face with his six fingered hand and sat on his bed surrounded by stacks of books that nearly reached the ceiling. He didn't say a word. "Ford!?" Fiddleford stood up abruptly in shock from the entrance and ran over to his friend who seemed upset. He stood at the foot of Ford's bed to see his friend wiping tears from his pale face, using his sleeve which was torn like the rest of his clothing. Ford looked up to see those sea blue eyes filled with so much worry, he wiped his tears away faster and tried to smile. "O..Oh, h..hello, Fiddleford." stuttering, now Fiddleford knew something was definitely wrong. The southerner sat down beside Ford and gently rubbed his back, hoping it would sooth his friend. "What happened?" He stared into Ford's brown eyes, trying to hold back his anger towards whoever did this to Ford. Ford curled his fingers into a fist. "I..I...some guys were talking about Stonewall..." With this the room fell silent. It wasn't something Fiddleford liked to remember. "They were saying that all those...." Ford winced, he wasn't going to say the word. "should have been killed for what they did...that they should go back to Hell..." Ford could feel his eyes becoming wet again, and Fiddleford's body tensed up. 1969. It was only around three years ago, they were sixteen, it was all over the news for weeks, all those poor people being treated like garbage that needed to be crushed. "I think they were comparing those people to the hippie movement and....I just wanted to tell how serious of an event that was a..and it shouldn't be talked about lightly so they..they.." Ford clung on to Fiddleford hoping for comfort and the southerner gave him the comfort. "Fiddleford, I remember the reports, I remember the footage, the violence and brutality....m...my father watched...h..he" Ford's voice cracked under strain. "he sat Stanley and I down and said...h..he said that if either of us chose to be a fag, he'd correct us a...and i..if we still were sick he...he'd...he threatened us. He'd rather be convicted of murdering his own son than having a gay one."  Ford backed away from Fiddleford who reached for him. "I..I'm sick. I'm nothing but a useless fag." Ford choked on his words through his tears. He was trying not to scream though he felt like it, he didn't want the whole building to hear. "Ford.." Fiddleford started moving closer to Ford, who almost knocked over a stack of books as he held his knees and and buried his face in his arms, not wanting to face his friend that he surely disappointed.  "No." Fiddleford wrapped his arms around Ford and held on tightly. "Stanford Pines, never say that. You aren't useless, you're anything but useless. You're my best friend, you mean the world to me, just because yer' gay doesn't change that. You're still a human being, a living breathing life form. You matter, you are important. You have a soul and a brain, anyone who says otherwise lacks those. You're gonna change the world." Fiddleford pulled away from the hug and gave a little smile to Ford who was blushing, and clearly shocked. "And if it's any consolation, I'm bisexual." He winked and chuckled lightly, which made Ford finally smile. "Thanks, Fidds." He said meekly and gave the southerner another hug, feeling the light brown hair touch his burning face lightly, made him feel so relaxed. "Let's get ya cleaned up."   

~

Fiddleford was snapped back into reality by the sound of screaming five year olds. His face went from somber to concerned within seconds as he, Ford and Tate stood in front of a crudely decorated door, which the screaming seemed to be coming from. "Kindergarten." Both he and Ford said in a disgusted tone. They both loved kids but Kindergarten was overwhelming, all the snot, drool, other fluids, not to mention the constant smell of markers, glue, and Play Dough." What a lovely environment for learning." Fiddleford rolled his eyes, and Ford nudged him in the arm and stared into the out of control room. The two men were geniuses and could easily teach Tate what he needed to know and then some but, this was more convenient for everyone and their needs, unfortunately.

{I tried to end it on a light hearted note so, yay, the next chapter isn't going to have any angst.......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................probably.}